Bedroom – Friday Fictioneers

AnElephantCant work without broadband
He is still without it today
So bear with him please
He is almost on his knees
He hopes that by Friday he can come back out to play

Once again it is Friday Fictioneer time, with our exalted leader the legendary Rochelle.
The idea is to write a very short story, circa 100 words, based on this picture prompt (below).
That’s it, really.
You can follow the link and read lots of of really good stories by really good writers.
And AnElephant’s.

Copyright – Rochelle Wisoff-Fields

Copyright – Rochelle Wisoff-Fields


The tinkling of the wind chimes causes the panic to grasp her throat again, the first time in months.
She knows she has been overly protective of her five-year old daughter since the violent death of her husband two years ago, but she reaches the bedroom in four long steps.
Who opened the window, sweetheart, she asks, trying to stay calm, but hearing the tremor in her voice.
Silly Mummy! Daddy, of course, like always!
Her nerves are on edge, her eyes everywhere.
So where is Daddy now, angel?
I’m right here, my love, his voice answers from behind her.

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66 Responses to Bedroom – Friday Fictioneers

  1. Penny L Howe says:

    Chilling, sets the scene perfectly for the talking poltergeist! 🙂


  2. Sarah Ann says:

    Nice and creepy. Would love to know what mummy does next – scream, faint, jump out the window? 😉


  3. The wind chimes in the room are such a great way to show how paranoid she is of break-ins. I love the last line. It took me by surprise.


  4. JackieP says:

    Children always seem to be unfazed by ghosts. I suppose we grow to suspect them as we get older. I really liked this story. I wonder if the mom will accept daddy as easily as the child? Hmmm probably not. 😉


  5. Dee says:

    I’m still thinking about the violent death of the husband, who killed him and why…
    Great scary story, well done elephant


  6. nightlake says:

    The dad is sure to be a nice guy. scary story


  7. neenslewy says:

    Woahoo – argh! I liked the whole flash and thought visiting his daughter was sweet and then came your end line and I made the noises at the start of the comment. Way to leave the reader hanging
    😉 well done!


  8. Ooh, that was very scary, Really it was. Well done. I think I have to leave the lights on when I go to bed tonight….


  9. I hope after the immediate fright they can settle to a nice chat
    very very well done!


  10. jwdwrites says:

    Oh no! Why did she have to ask? 🙂


  11. I hope he is a nice ghost… wind chimes are spooky sometimes.


  12. Joe Owens says:

    Eerie and enticing.


  13. zookyworld says:

    The first sentence grabbed my attention right away, with her panic from the wind chimes — and then that ending! Chilling. I hope your broadband comes back for you. Did Daddy from the story mess with it?


  14. camgal says:

    Goosebumps 🙂 good job


  15. GFixation says:

    Is this the Mistresses? Lol. I like, I like.


  16. RoSy says:

    Oh my!
    Not sure how I’d react. But – I’d like to think that I’d find my composure after a loud yelp & after getting back up from passing out.


  17. Can she hear him? Can she see him? Was it his twin who died?


  18. helenmidgley says:

    I was shouting, don’t look round!! Great job 🙂


  19. summerstommy2 says:

    Fabulous sir elephant, took my breath away.


  20. misskzebra says:

    One of the most genuinely chilling FF stories I’ve read in a while. Good work!


  21. Good Helper Woman says:

    Don’t you fret now…anelephantcant worry about us when all your absence does is help us to appreciate you more. We will wait and wait until anelephantcan!


  22. Linda Vernon says:

    Wonderful! I don’t know whether to be happy or frightened out of my wits. I love the way this story starts out with it’s engines revved up!


  23. Oh! That’s a ‘catch-your-breath’ ending alright! Good story. 🙂


  24. emmylgant says:

    Jeepers! I almost jumped out of my skin! Shades of Psycho here.
    Well done! Genial!


  25. dmmacilroy says:

    Dear AEC,

    What a great (and spooky tale). I like the wind chimes and the way the daughter is not afraid. Well done.




  26. Alastair says:

    Ye Gads! I know to expect the unexpected with you, but that was seriously unexpected. Well done, a totally brilliant story.


  27. :::::hiding under the bed::::


  28. A bit creepy but nice!


  29. Dear Elephant,

    This one sent a chill through me. You certainly stepped outside the box. 😉 Good one.




  30. howanxious says:

    Yay! A scary story… Reminds me of Salem’s Lot.


  31. Ye Pirate says:

    Yikes! Is daddy a nice guy after all!?


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