The Church – Friday Fictioneers

AnElephantCant write a wee rhyme here
He is struggling a bit with research
It is not that he’s slow
But he does need to know
Whether that is a kirk or a church

Once again it is Friday Fictioneer time.
Presented weekly by the delightful Rochelle, this is collection of short stories from one or two chaps and chapesses of talent.
And one from AnElephant.
Oh well.
The idea is to write a very short story, circa 100 words, based on this picture prompt (below).
That’s it.

Copyright Clare Fuller

Copyright Clare Fuller

The Church

She hasn’t seen him for years and is really looking forward to it.
They spent twenty years together, raised two children.
One of whom couldn’t be bothered to make the trip today.
But their daughter is with her, although perhaps not quite so exuberant.
Still, she feels good, hopes she looks good, wants to be at her best for the big moment.
Her legs are elegantly crossed in her tailored suit and expensive high heels.
She chats happily to the people around her.
She stands and smooths her skirt before stepping forward.
Then she smiles radiantly into the open coffin.

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62 Responses to The Church – Friday Fictioneers

  1. I love this piece. That is all


  2. pattisj says:

    Nicely done! I read to the end, then read the first line again–she was really looking forward to it. I always enjoy your poems, too.


  3. Sarah Ann says:

    Love the line about the legs. There was something about them being ‘elegantly crossed’ that pointed me to the denouement. And that smile, if only we knew more about what she’d been through. Somehow I don’t feel her poor deceased ex was wholly to blame for the failure of their relationship.


    • Aren’t you just so sweet!
      Actually her deceased was probably not the nicest chap you’d ever meet.
      But AnElephant is always thrilled when someone picks up on the little clues he likes to sprinkle around.


  4. She seems a little too happy to be seeing her ex husband dead.
    On second thought….;)


  5. Sad, but I have to say I thought something like that was coming. Nevertheless, still had impact. Good job!


  6. Jacey Faye says:

    I didn’t see that one coming either — and I love how well you managed to surprise me! Nicely, nicely done, especially that last image of her beaming cheerfully into his coffin. What a reunion!


  7. Honie Briggs says:

    Damn, that’s cold. One non-exuberant child and one no show? What does a mother have to do to share her happiness, cut ’em in for half? You totally surprised me on this one. Superb!!


  8. jwdwrites says:

    Wow, let my guard down there, thought it was all cosy and nice and then.. Bam! Ghoulishly done. 🙂


  9. Very well told tale, especially for an elephant. Who knew you could be so elegant as well as eloquent?


  10. Carrie says:

    definitely wasn’t expecting that ending! Nice job


  11. claireful says:

    Great twist, and also the layers – the fact that one child couldn’t be bothered to make the trip is rather telling.


  12. Very clever. I would quite like to attend a funeral with a light heart…


  13. Dear Elephant,

    I suspect she’s smiling because she’s still his beneficiary. Well done.




  14. dmmacilroy says:

    Dear AEC,

    Another good story from you. Very telling piece. Well written and subtly layered. Good job.




  15. summerstommy2 says:

    Well done Sir elephant. Had me guessing.


  16. Sandra says:

    Be positive, I always say. The image of the ex-wife smiling radiantly into the coffin will stay with me, I feel.


  17. Brenda says:

    Hi ElephantCant! Nice writing — very nice! More details would be great. Why does she smile?


  18. Jan Brown says:

    Good one! Very unexpected, and wickedly funny.


  19. RoSy says:

    What an ending!
    Good riddance or bad children?


  20. It sounds like the funeral is one of the best days of her life.


  21. tchistorygal says:

    Smiling radiantly into the coffin??? Yikes! Even if I hated someone, I’m not sure I could smile radiantly into their coffin, but I’m not in this story! 🙂


  22. high five and raspberries says:

    Trés drole!


  23. Alastair says:

    I would say I wasn’t expecting that, but this was you, so I figured it would be something like that 🙂 That’s not a bad thing. I mean that I figured it would have a brilliant twist to it,.

    Another great story my friend


  24. emmylgant says:

    Wow. Tu me surprends encore. Je ne m’y attendais pas du tout.
    Nicely crafted as usual.


  25. Elephant, that was a clever take. I hope the narrator can come back to haunt her.

    Tack så mycket


  26. utesmile says:

    What ??? Didn’t expect that. 🙂


  27. neenslewy says:

    Wasn’t expecting that – at all. Fantastic writing. Clever.


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