The Raft – Friday Fictioneers

AnElephantCant be a swashbuckling hero
He’s too afraid of Styx and stones
If the sea is too deep
He prefers not to leap
In case he ends up in the Locker of Davy Jones

Once again it is Friday Fictioneer time.
Where our admirable Admiral Rochelle leads her crew of scribes into a fleet, nay, a veritable armada of fishy tales.
And AnAmphibiousElephant splashes around in the shallow end.
The idea is to write a very short story, circa 100 words, based on this picture prompt (below).
That’s it.

Copyright – Ted Strutz

Copyright – Ted Strutz

The Raft

She begs him not to swim out today.
He insists, to the consternation of his friends.
What a shower of wimps, he laughs, plunging into the high waves.
They see him clamber onto the swaying raft, perhaps 80 metres from the beach, and wave to him in relief.
He dives off the far side, and is not seen again.
The emergency services and coastguard can find no trace of his body.
Currents, they explain, and a deep trench.

She smiles across the table of the luxury liner at the man she loves.
I guess the scuba equipment worked okay, darling?

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70 Responses to The Raft – Friday Fictioneers

  1. atrm61 says:

    This is simply superbly crafted -loved the intrigue and the twist at the end-a pleasant one;-)


  2. elmowrites says:

    I’m left wondering if it’s the same “she”, elephant. intruiging indeed


  3. erinleary says:

    Elaborate plotting to provide her freedom. I expect money was the reason. Nicely told tale, Sir Elephant.


  4. kbnelson says:

    Oooooh. Now that was sneaky. Love the twist at the end!


  5. emmylgant says:

    Terriffic! I love second chance and do overs. There is a thriller in that story…


  6. kz says:

    very clever 🙂


  7. camgal says:

    Creepy but exciting tone. Excellent Anelephantcant 🙂


  8. It seems to be about death and murder this week… What a scary fellow AnElephant is! If I were a man, I would stay clear of the water; that’s for sure! Well done.


  9. Seems we all went with death this week… death and murder! Scary wives; I’m not sure I’d be in the water if I was a husband! Well done.


  10. Anja says:

    Wait….I am not sure what to do with my tally. It feels so incomplete not to add a mark.


  11. Good one! I am currently watching a lot of “Bones.” She would love solving this one if they could find the body.


  12. As long as she can play the grieving widow realistically enough, this seems like a foolproof plan…until chapter two when the police inspector happens to be on the same boat as them. 🙂


  13. Jan Brown says:

    Very creative! A twisting tale of disappearance 🙂


  14. hugmamma says:

    Naughty elephant! Scheming and dabbling in danger. Otherwise…perfect!


  15. They’ll get away with it, unless we’re talking Alfred Hitchcock Presents. Well-told, Elephant!


  16. A scam is always great… wonderful


  17. vbholmes says:

    Methinks they’d best check out that mustachioed man skulking behind the nearby pillar–he has insurance investigator written all over him.


  18. Sandra says:

    I hope they get away with it. I think they will. Nice one.


  19. mike olley says:

    Life insurance comes in handy sometimes, especially if you can claim it (and even enjoy it!) while still alive. I like the twist in your tale.


  20. dmmacilroy says:

    Dear AEC,

    Long swim submerged but worth it, I’m figuring. Starting over is much better than suicide or death by stagnation.




  21. Adam Ickes says:

    Guess he should have listened and not gone in the water. That’ll show him! He’ll never make that mistake, or any other, again.


  22. Much better than a messy divorce!


  23. Fantastic tale of double indemnity in reverse. Totally surprised me.


  24. jwdwrites says:

    A modern day Reggie Perrin? Good story Elephant. 🙂


  25. Al says:

    Oh very good 😀 Get rid of one life to start another. Fantastic


  26. Dear Elephant,

    Oh the duplicity! Bad one, but in a good way I liked this.




  27. As I suspected as I read thru Sir elephant, there’s a twist in this elephants trunk, and I was right. Good one mate.


  28. DCTdesigns says:

    That’s one way to start from scratch. Which begs the question what was he running from?


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