Paint It Black – Min Min Challenge

Artwork by Phil Burns

The Great New Min Min Challenge:

In less than 250 words write a story starting “Paint It Black”.

Click here to hear the author read his words:

Paint It Black

So, for One Million Pounds each, that’s a grand total of, erm, let’s see, yes, Two Million Pounds, all you have to do is answer this last question.
And Hamish, you’ve got lucky, it’s on your specialist subject, The Rolling Stones!
Hamish MacDoughnut and his randomly selected partner, the voluptuous Ms Wanda Wowbody, grin and high-five!
Here’s the question, you have sixty seconds to answer.
Are you ready?
What controversial Rolling Stones single, released in May 1966, opens with the words ‘I see a red door’?
Ooh, cries Wanda, I know this one! Let me answer it, Hamish! I’ll be ever so grateful!
Haud yer wheesht, wummin, says Hamish, scowling. You don’t think I’d risk a million pounds on an uneducated wench like yourself!
I’ll have you know, Hamish, I’ve got a degree in Needlecraft and Eastern Philosophy, so there, you tartan toerag!
Well, I have a Masters in The Influence of Rock and Roll on Alien Culture! Or was it The Influence of Alien Culture on Rock and Roll? Whatever, I’m the expert.
The two have been bickering and squabbling since they were pulled from the hat together, and yet they’ve answered every question to reach this critical point.
Okay, folks, time’s a-ticking! Get this right, and you get One Million Pounds each. Get it wrong and you go home with nothing! I need your answer now. Yes, Hamish?
I’ll answer, he says over Wanda’s protests. Final answer.
Sympathy for the Devil.

Unknown's avatar

About ceayr

A Scot who has discovered peace in a small town he calls Medville on the Côte Vermeille, C.E. Ayr has spent a large part of his life in the West of Scotland and a large part elsewhere. His first job was selling programmes at his local football club and he has since tried 73 other career paths, the longest being in IT, with varying degrees of success. He is somewhat nomadic, fairly irresponsible and, according to his darling daughter, a bit random. So, nobody’s perfect.
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17 Responses to Paint It Black – Min Min Challenge

  1. clark's avatar clark says:

    (Not surprisingly), your two protagonists totally steal the show.
    Cool effect in conveying a sense of both Miz Wowbody and McDoughtnut in their spirited dialogue.

    fun story, yo

  2. obbverse's avatar obbverse says:

    Time for Wanda to introduce Hubris Hamish to ‘Black And Blue,’ on repeat after repeat. And repeat until his as- ears burn.

  3. Lindsey's avatar Lindsey says:

    Very clever Mr Ayr. I loved these two characters and felt tense throughout.

  4. My two favorite Stones songs, although Jumping’ Jack Flash is right in there, too. Well, this was fun and as a lover of trivia and games of that sort, I fell for this little tale hook, line and sinker! Great fun, C.E.! 😎
    By coincidence, I also wrote a story called Paint It Black, although mine is quite different from yours. I wouldn’t dream of monopolizing your site with my story so if you’re interested in reading it, you’ll have to check out my site.
    You know where to find me. 😉 🐘

  5. As someone who is willing to admit to being addicted to quiz shows, this piece and its marvelous characters nails them. It would be Pointless to disagree. And if you do, haud yer wheesht.

  6. jenne49's avatar jenne49 says:

    Oh, I do hope Miss Wanda Wowbody uses her needlecraft kit to inflict serious pain on McDoughnut. (Fabulous names!)
    Your language fest had me laughing from beginning to end
    Such a great satire on the know-it-all guy and the ditsy woman… And, of course, the ubiquitous game show.
    Haud yer wheesht – love that phrase!

  7. Liz H's avatar Liz H says:

    He gets no sympathy from me!
    So much is wasted when the default is fight about it.
    Both great songs, though!

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