Umbrella – Friday Fictioneers

Friday Fictioneers is hosted by the wonderful Rochelle, the undisputed master of what I call Sound Bite Fiction.
She sets the weekly challenge, and the standard.
Dale Rogerson’s superb photo takes me home a week before my flight does.
The idea, as always, is to write a story of around 100 words based on the picture, below.

© Dale Rogerson

© Dale Rogerson

Umbrella

He could not look less like a hitman.
He dresses in a suit and wears a tie, which can be useful occasionally.
He is not particularly big, or well built, more wiry.
But he is quick, his eyes miss nothing.
And then, don’t forget, he has that umbrella.
It is multiple weapons in one.
He can do almost anything with it.
A legend with a brolly.
My job is to terminate him.
So I do.
I call in my report.
Wednesday 28th October 2015. Sauchiehall Street, Glasgow.
Why Scotland?
No reason.
I look out at the pouring rain, and smile.

About ceayr

A Scot who has discovered Paradise in a small town he calls Medville on the Côte d'Azur, C.E. Ayr has spent a large part of his life in the West of Scotland and a large part elsewhere. His first job was selling programmes at his local football club and he has since tried 73 other career paths, the longest being in IT, with varying degrees of success. He is somewhat nomadic, fairly irresponsible and, according to his darling daughter, a bit random.
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65 Responses to Umbrella – Friday Fictioneers

  1. ah, you do crime so well! And here is where I leave my (belated) invite to pick a cliche and base a story off of it, any length and type. Would love to see your take on it

    Like

  2. Is that a new umbrella? 😉

    Like

  3. Susan says:

    A cold tale of hitmen well told. Made me laugh some. 🙂

    Like

  4. Graham Lawrence says:

    Great story. Love the Scottish reference (maybe because I lived for a year in Glasgow myself).

    Like

  5. Oh jolly, I had to look up “brolly.”
    Well, as they say in termination-land: What goes up, must come down.
    Randy

    Like

  6. subroto says:

    Hmm. Eliminating hitmen or filing a report, wonder what’s his favorite part of the job? Nicely done.

    Like

  7. plaridel says:

    smart move. he made his move in the rain while the guy couldn’t his umbrella as a weapon.

    Like

  8. Why Scotland? It’s atmospheric, represents exploited people, and the guys there just look fetching in kilts. Nice “Spy Who Came In From the Cold” feel to this piece.

    Like

  9. helenmidgley says:

    So intriguing, loved the 007 ishness of it all 😉

    Like

  10. Dave says:

    He killed The Penguin? Noooooooo!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. draliman says:

    Good idea to attack him in a country where he was almost certain to be using his brolly for the recommended purpose 🙂

    Like

  12. Very matter of fact about it all, prepared for everything and phased by nothing. Would love to read more of his ‘adventures’.

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  13. Thank heavens for rain. Loved the story.

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  14. wildbilbo says:

    Very clever – difficult to defend oneself when one’s weapon is keeping one dry! Good work 007 🙂
    Great stuff
    KT

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  15. I enjoyed all the comments here as much as I enjoyed your piece, CEAyr! That was one COLD piece of writing! Brrrr!
    As always, well-done, if very dark.
    Reminds me of a Robert Parker novel. Also, Dick Francis.

    Like

  16. misskzebra says:

    Something so nice and whimsical about this story, despite the subject matter.

    Like

    • ceayr says:

      Well, it is just an everyday story about hired killers, hard to see how it could get dark, don’t you think.
      I do hope your comment means that it entertained you in some way.

      Like

  17. “A legend with a brolly” I suspect that makes (oops, made) him easier to find. And I agree with Rochelle. He’s so matter of fact about killing – it doesn’t seem to matter. Kudos.

    Like

    • ceayr says:

      No, Alicia, the brolly makes it easier to stay dry!
      But when he is using it in this way, it is less effective in others.
      So the narrator takes his opportunity, matter of factly.

      Like

  18. Sightsnbytes says:

    a journey into the thoughts of a gun for hire. I liked this one

    Like

  19. gahlearner says:

    Hitmen give me the chills, and here are two of them. Clever trickery with the umbrella, too (if I understood that correctly, I don’t know much about Scotland.)

    Liked by 1 person

  20. I thought Umbrellas were useless in Scotland… To quote a Scotsman I once met on Sicily.. “A Scotsman never go far without his Mac”… 🙂 great fun

    Liked by 1 person

    • ceayr says:

      It all depends, Bjorn on which side of Scotland you are on.
      As Robert Burns says:
      ‘Cauld blaws the wind frae east to west,
      The drift is driving sairly;
      Sae loud and shill I hear the blast,
      I’m sure it’s winter fairly.’
      So your chum is correct, no point in having a brolly in Edinburgh.
      But ‘doon the watter’ on the Clyde, it is a different story.
      Small country, big weather!

      Liked by 1 person

  21. Dale says:

    Nice. It’s only a question of time before the hunters become the hunted, don’t you think?

    Liked by 1 person

  22. You got me worried for a bit, saying there’s no place like home and telling a story about the hitman. I thought, what kind of place is that? 😀 Thankfully, Glasgow cleared all the fog in my cluttered mind. I like your off-hand tone.

    Like

    • ceayr says:

      Laughing here, Loré, I think I said I was visiting, nothing more.
      And you should know this piece is pure fiction.
      Glasgow is in fact a warm, vibrant and friendly city, full of culture and charm.
      Glad you liked the story.

      Liked by 1 person

  23. Corina says:

    I liked this…especially the last line. It tells us who he is. As usual, very well done!

    Like

  24. micklively says:

    Will the Scots eventually evolve to include umbrellas in their DNA?
    Good piece.

    Liked by 1 person

  25. Sandra says:

    The coldness of your main character almost sears the reader. Still, if you’ve got to go, a wet October day in Sauchiehall Street sounds like as good a time as any. And as depressing a way as any. Good one CE.

    Liked by 1 person

  26. Reblogged this on anelephantcant and commented:
    AnElephantCant claim to always be focused
    Almost anything serves as a temporary distraction
    He wonders why Dale
    Is not locked up in a jail
    For confusing him with that weird-looking underwater perhaps Canadian contraption

    Liked by 1 person

  27. Dear C.E.

    Your hitman whose mission is to kill another hitman is so matter of fact. I enjoyed the tone of it. So James Bond. (I miss Sean Connery). Well done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 1 person

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