The Visit – Sunday Photo Fiction

Sunday Photo Fiction is a weekly challenge presented by Susan Spaulding, who has taken over this great weekly prompt from my old friend Al Forbes.
And the lady herself provides this week’s photo
The idea here is to write a short story (200 word max) inspired by what you see in the picture (below).
Click on this link to enter your tale, and see what others have written.

© Susan Spaulding

Click here to hear the author read the tale:

The Visit

We don’t like your type around these parts.
Still eating, I look up at the speaker.
He is a big man, but running to fat.
His best days are some years in the past.
He looks like he was the school bully twenty-five years ago, and he is living on the memories.
A few others, around the same age, are behind him, in a semi-circle.
They are
smirking, egging him on.
I’ll be on my way as soon as I finish here, I tell him m
ildly, indicating my pancakes.
He grins widely, but there is a flicker in his eyes.
Disappointment or doubt, I can’t tell.
Eat fast, he sneers, I ain’t a patient man.
He looks to his cronies for approval, and they react predictably with laughter and words of support.
Ten minutes, I say, focussing on my food.
Make it five and we’ll have no hassle, he retorts,
putting his hand on my shoulder.
I pause, fork halfway to my mouth.
My eyes go to his hand, then move to his face.
He blanches, his hand drops abruptly.
He has just realised how lucky he is.
Five it is, I say.
This visit is just reconnaissance.

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19 Responses to The Visit – Sunday Photo Fiction

  1. Mike says:

    I think that they all should move on before he returns,


  2. Violet Lentz says:

    Get him with the fork CE!!!


  3. Abhijit Ray says:

    Some bully this man. Why he doesn’t like your presence there?


  4. Reminds me of a typical Jack Reacher scene, though the ending does indicate that our guy is most probably an assassin, and not a hero in the conventional sense 🙂

    A very Merry Christmas to you and your family sir. Cheers.


  5. Harry Hamid says:

    This is great and I like what it doesn’t say. For instance, are you a stranger in the area, and is that why you’re unwelcome? Is this a question of race, religion, something like that? It makes it a menacing and somewhat universal “You’re not one of us” scenarios. Nice.


  6. Piyali says:

    A good lesson for the bully it seems


  7. Iain Kelly says:

    Always nice to see the school bully put in their proper place.


  8. Sandra says:

    Menace is oozing out of this piece like syrup out of a pancake. I wouldn’t be around when the first ‘official’ visit is paid.


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