Rock Pool – Friday Fictioneers

Friday Fictioneers is hosted by the wonderful Rochelle, the undisputed master of what I call Sound Bite Fiction.
She sets the weekly challenge, and the standard.
Today’s curious photo by Janet Webb is again from 2013. It intrigued me then, and it intrigues me now.
This is my take on it from those long gone days, back when I was hardly more than a laddie!
The idea, as always, is to write a story of around 100 words based on the picture, below.

© Janet Webb

© Janet Webb

This is the hardest reading I have ever tried. I am not sure it works too well.

Rock Pool

Hurry, Grandpa, there might be crabs in this one.
Oops, I just put my foot in there, I’m all wet!
And look at that funny thing, it looks like a sponge, is it a sponge?
Oh, is it?
Why is there a wasp nest on the beach?
Do you know everything, Grandpa?
I’m going to look in here for crabs.
Oh, look, fish, lots of little fish!
There might be crabs under this rock, it’s quite big.
Will you help me please, Grandpa?
It’s a bit heavy and I’ve got my feet all wet again!
Grandpa?
Where …..?
Grandpa!
MUMMY!!!!!

About ceayr

A Scot who has discovered Paradise in a small town he calls Medville on the Côte d'Azur, C.E. Ayr has spent a large part of his life in the West of Scotland and a large part elsewhere. His first job was selling programmes at his local football club and he has since tried 73 other career paths, the longest being in IT, with varying degrees of success. He is somewhat nomadic, fairly irresponsible and, according to his darling daughter, a bit random.
This entry was posted in Sound Bite Fiction and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

23 Responses to Rock Pool – Friday Fictioneers

  1. Margaret says:

    I always knew rock pools were dangerous places. Nice buildup of tension and a mysterious cliff-hanger of a finish.

    Like

  2. Tales From The Trunk says:

    Great stuff, like always!

    Like

  3. mandibelle16 says:

    This seems so innocent and joyful through most of the story. The boy thinks Grandpa knows everything then, Grandpa disappears or the boy got lost. Either would be frightening for the boy who wants his mom now. Nice write CE. Great twist at the end.

    Like

  4. Who was lost? Grandpa or grandson? Either way, it hurts!

    Like

  5. rgayer55 says:

    I love the way you say, “Mummy!” 🙂 It’s similar to the way I whine, “Connie.”

    Liked by 1 person

  6. The sudden tension at the end was expertly done. I loved it!

    Like

  7. liz young says:

    Great dialogue – and thank goodness the child’s mother was there to pcik up both him and his grandpa.

    Like

  8. draliman says:

    So fun until the heartbreaking end. Great one!

    Like

  9. voulaah says:

    thank you so much for sharing this post
    have a very happy thursday
    Kisses

    Like

  10. gahlearner says:

    The voice of the child is amazing, wandering from one little wonder to the next. But poor Grandpa? What happened? Evil cliffhanger here…

    Like

  11. paulmclem says:

    Just reading the story I can imagine the spoken version would be tricky. Good one.

    Like

  12. Oh dear! I hope Grandpa wasn’t swallowed up by a sea monster!

    Like

  13. Al says:

    Poor kid. Must be terrifying for him. Hopefully Grandpa has just decided to have a little snooze. You can see the hysteria in his voice when he calls for his mum

    Like

  14. Oh the eagerness of youth… i hope that grandpa was just left behind his running feet… I keep my fingers crossed for grandpa.

    Like

  15. iainthekid says:

    Poor Grandpa, I do hope he is okay! Great atmosphere and description to set the scene.

    Like

  16. Sandra says:

    The tension ramps up at the end there, and the voice is so right! Well done, CE. I hope Mummy got there in time to help.

    Like

  17. Graham Lawrence says:

    I agree with Rochelle and must admit I read it and listened at the same time. Lovely twist at the end.

    Like

  18. Dear CE,

    Hearing you read was even more entertaining than your story. Although you left me wondering what calamity has befallen Grandpa. 8O.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Like

  19. neilmacdon says:

    Skilfully uses the spaces between words

    Like

  20. Lynn Love says:

    Ooh, you’re evil. You give us such a sweet piece of dialogue, a lovely wander on a beach – the voice is great by the way – then snatch all that warmth away with three words –
    Where …..?
    Grandpa!
    MUMMY!!!!!
    Very nicely paced and constructed – tense stuff, C.

    Like

Leave your Sound Bite here

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s