Peter – Friday Fictioneers

Friday Fictioneers is hosted by the wonderful Rochelle, the undisputed master of what I call Sound Bite Fiction.
She sets the weekly challenge, and the standard.
Ted’s colourful image took me to one of my favourite haunts, the little café in the square.
Where happiness abounds.
The idea, as always, is to write a story of around 100 words based on the picture, below.

© Ted Strutz

© Ted Strutz

Peter
I am the only one who feels sorry for Peter.
He runs the carousel beside the little café in the square.
He often wanders over for a coffee.
He is a bit slow, but an okay guy.
Everyone thinks so.
Nobody connected him to the missing children.
We are appalled when his boss investigates the smell.
And finds two children under the floor of the spaceship, and another in the helicopter.
Everyone wonders how he thought he would get away with it.
Personally I think his boss is a more likely child killer.
But what do I know?
Apart from who put the kids there.

About ceayr

A Scot who has discovered Paradise in a small town he calls Medville on the Côte d'Azur, C.E. Ayr has spent a large part of his life in the West of Scotland and a large part elsewhere. His first job was selling programmes at his local football club and he has since tried 73 other career paths, the longest being in IT, with varying degrees of success. He is somewhat nomadic, fairly irresponsible and, according to his darling daughter, a bit random.
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53 Responses to Peter – Friday Fictioneers

  1. Corina says:

    Wow. Just wow.

    Like

  2. Whoa! This was one of the most chilling stories so far on this fairground-themed week (I had a chilling one myself, but yours goes right down to the “zero at the bone” feeling).
    Taut, tense narrative voice, and brilliant characterization. I really enjoyed this, Ceayr!

    Like

  3. nonnaci says:

    Clever story! I also find that the line structure you used helps the narration.

    Like

  4. CE, this really pulled me along, and then smacked me in the face! Wow. Really chilling.

    Like

  5. Dear CE,
    A mystery in so few words. A great deal said in that 1st line with the kicker at the end.
    It makes me dislike fairgrounds so much more than I do.
    Chilling and creepy … !!! Are we in a Halloween state of mind?
    I love these FF stories. SO many great writers of which you are at the top. Wll done…!!!
    Isadora 😎

    Liked by 1 person

  6. ansumani says:

    Clever narration here …each word crafted with purpose. Nicely done.

    Like

  7. Graham Lawrence says:

    Interesting end. I really like the pace and rhythm of the story.

    Like

  8. Sightsnbytes says:

    Great job. spooky take on the photo

    Like

  9. Great ‘the narrator did it’ story. I hope you don’t kill through blogs 🙂

    Like

  10. Melanie says:

    Sick ‘fellow’, killing children and letting an innocent man take the fall…not that a serial killer is just going to announce his guilt because he feels sorry for his scapegoat. You squeezed the life out of each and every word here. I am once again in awe of your Sound Bite skills.

    Liked by 1 person

    • ceayr says:

      You are too kind, my dear lady.
      Comments like this are music to my ears.
      I have made a tiny edit to the 2nd word of your comment because, despite the huge weekly loss of life, this is a family friendly blog.
      Thank you for your visit and your wonderful compliments.

      Liked by 2 people

  11. A creepy serial child killer and we are still not sure who it is but I don’t like this guy who is telling the story because he is so cold/detached about it. Even if it is not him.

    Like

  12. Oh! very good, now who exactly did it?

    Like

  13. You wove a delightful web with an evil twist at the end. Funny how carnivals bring out the creepy side.

    Like

  14. I think there was some real reason to feel sorry for Peter, but I guess it will be the narrator lighting the fire under Peter’s stake..

    Like

  15. paulmclem says:

    Nice twist at the end. I say nice in writing sense of course 🙂

    Like

  16. You are redeemed by your sympathy for Peter. Or maybe not.

    Like

  17. micklively says:

    I’d be interested to see the evidence against each of them.
    Good piece.

    Like

  18. Sandra says:

    Such a menacing twist at the end there, unexpected and beautifully understated.

    Like

  19. Dear CE,

    It’s nice that the narrator feels sorry for Peter, since he knows only to well who really put those poor little souls there. A nice serving of subtle with a hefty side of chill.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 2 people

  20. emmylgant says:

    Aaarrrggghhh!
    The little cafe in the square is a most insalubrious place… Medville beware!
    You give me the heebe-jeebies sometimes the way your brilliant imagination moves in dark places!
    But I really like the way you lead the reader through the tight maze of facts to the open conclusion. Great writing.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Miles Rost says:

    Or maybe they’re in it together, and he’s not that slow…

    Well written!

    Like

  22. Reblogged this on anelephantcant and commented:
    AnElephantCant go up very high
    He is scared of a carousel
    He is big and round
    Likes his feet on the ground
    And even that does not always work out too well

    Like

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