Friday Fictioneers is hosted by the wonderful Rochelle, the undisputed master of what I call Sound Bite Fiction.
She sets the weekly challenge, the standard, and the prompt photo.
The idea, as always, is to write a story of around 100 words based on the picture below, which this week is supplied by Jan Wayne Fields.
© Jan Wayne Fields
Habakkuk
Hello, CE!
Hello, Arthur, haven’t seen you in years!
Yep, long time. This is my wife, Delilah.
Very biblical!
What? No, from the Tom Jones song, y’know, taa-raa-rararararaaa!
Oh. Right.
These are our kids, Elizabeth, Margaret, Mary, James, George, Charles, John and Habakkuk.
That’s an unusual name.
Which one?
Erm… He’s a big lad. So you decided to stop at just eight then?
To tell you the truth, CE, we planned to stop after three. We thought that was plenty!
But…?
Well, we didn’t stop because we didn’t realise.
You didn’t realise what?
We didn’t realise what was causing them.
LOL! Well, some sex ed might come handy (the education part, seems they got the sex part down pat). As for the number … I’m one of seven. Girls. Yep. I think they knew what was ‘causing us’ but maybe not what was ‘causing’ us all to be girls … (I don’t think they ever found out, given that all they got was girls …) 😉
Your father has my sympathy, Na’ama, with 8 girls running his life!
He deserves little sympathy … Or at least, not for that …
That aside, it is fun for us, sisters, to have each other. It’s like a little tribe.
Oh my….
Oh your what, Dawn?
It’s a shame the cap did not fit, then again perhaps not, as it allowed me to smile at the conversation
Ahem.
Thank you, Mike
Thanks for the laugh, CK!
Ronda
Very welcome, Ronda
PS CK is my brother!
Should’ve learnt about those other caps before. This was a riot, CE. Thanks for the laughs.
Cheers, Varad
So, I’m assuming they got “the talk” a little late in life!
Got to think they were a couple of kilts short of a pipe band, hmm?
If only Arthur could work out where his wife was all day or is she the victim of a repetitive immaculate conception. In Arthur’s case there must not be much beneath his bible belt.
I enjoyed this and it made me gasp -really!
Oh I think Arthur knows exactly where she is, and that is beneath his bible belt!
I have started your book, will keep you posted,
Many thanks – enjoy your reading.
I am glad they finally realised after eight 🙂
Some folk take a bit longer to grasp the basics!
Thanks for the laughs C.E.
Arthur is one mean machine, indeed! ha! ha!
One mean machine! I love it!
Ha! Ha! 🙂
Ha! I myself was wondering why so many. Thanks for going on the light side!
Glad you enjoyed, Alicia
Enjoyed the humor, C.E.
And I’m thrilled that no hats were beat up as a result of this story–except possibly a Tom Jones hat.
Only if the git is wearing it!
At least they cottoned on after eight 🙂
Not the quickest on the uptake, that’s for sure
My my my Habakkuk…. You made me laugh!
Why why why Habakkuk… Happy I did, Keith
Well now he’s got the hang of it, maybe his wife can look forward to a bit of a rest.
Nah, typical woman, can’t keep her hands off him…
Very amusing, it reminded me of the perhaps apocryphal story of some agency teaching a remote African village how to use condoms by demonstrating with a banana. When they returned some months later the pregnancy rate and infection rate hadn’t chnaged. When questiooned, all the men said they’d been following the instructions to the letter, every time before making love they’d put a condom on a banana.
Laughing. Perhaps apocryphal, Michael?
Hilarious! Especially the Tom Jones part.
It’s not unusual to find that funny, Kent!
Laughed out loud!
I am delighted, Trish
i suppose ignorance is bliss. 🙂
I think there was a fair amount of bliss over the years!
Thanks for making me smile 🙂
My pleasure
Diagnosis is the first step to a cure. That was fun. I love absurdist humor.
This reminds me of an old joke of mine. It was a play on “fixing” our animals. In case that’s an Americanism, it’s a euphemism for spaying. “There was something wrong with her. She just kept popping out babies. Now, she’s fixed. All better.”
Well, you gotta laugh, don’t you…
Oh, so funny! I didn’t get where you going until right at the end. “We didn’t know. . . Hilarious!
Thanks, Linda, comments like this make writing worthwhile!
Lol. Funny CE. Hope you’re well 🙂
I’m pretty good, Amanda, apart from the voice, maybe it’s down to lack of use!
Glad you were entertained.
I was indeed. Hope your voice improves. I know they’re starting to open up here more with Covid. Hopefully, things are good there and you’re able to get our more too. Cheers
A very amusing story. The last line is great, but I think “Which one?” is the funniest.
I admit I kinda like that one too!
Wow! I loved this CE. So funny. Do you think it’s people like this who become politicians? Some times, I wonder, although our Australian leaders are doing a remarkable job.
Hope you’re keeping well.
Best wishes,
Rowena
Glad you enjoyed, Rowena.
Sadly I think many of our politicians are psychopathic rather than dumb.
You could well be right, CE. As far as I can tell, everyone just loves NZ’s Prime Minister Jacinta Arden. She is firm but has such compassion. I wish we could clone her!!!
Well now, that caused a right out-loud laugh! Such a fun one, CE!
That’s why they call me Champignons
Ah oui? Pourquoi?
Fun guy
D’oh! Was I ever slow on the uptake…
Couldn’t stop laughing at your bonkers story, CE. Thank you!
Susan A Eames at
Travel, Fiction and Photos
And I am smiling!
Thank you, Susan
Dear CE,
Personally, I think Arthur’s making excuses for being a randy kind a guy. 😉 Wonder what a good nickname for Habakkuk would be? Hab? Kuk? Your story made me smile. (What? No recording?)
Shalom,
Rochelle
In a former life I read the works of a Glasgow author called J J Bell, which included a story about which I remember nothing except that it was called Habakkuk. I have always wanted to use it in a tale of my own.
Sorry about no reading, m’lady, the voice still comes and goes.
I’ll never sing Nessun Dorma again!
Well, at least Arthur’s been keeping himself busy! Told with your usual twinkle, C. You made me smile, as you so often do. Hope you’re keeping well
Then my day has been worthwhile, Lynn.
I am pretty much okay, thanks
Glad to hear it. Hope you can walk in the beach soon x
Ha ha, my wife and I had 7 kids, but I don’t have this excuse.
What, no Habakkuk?
This is a case of a little education goes a long way… A raincoat a go with the hat perhaps 😀.
Too dumb to live, some folk!
Entertaining conversation. Poor Arthur, all they children to cope with… someone should’ve told them sooner.
I always think that a licence should be required to have kids, stop people like this cluttering up the gene pool
You need one to drive a car, so surely…?
Aww, bless
Laughing.
Many blessings, Neil!