Friday Fictioneers is hosted by the wonderful Rochelle, the undisputed master of what I call Sound Bite Fiction.
She sets the weekly challenge, and the standard.
This week’s photo is by Ted Strutz, a regular supplier of interesting shots.
The idea, as always, is to write a story of around 100 words based on this picture, below.
© Ted Strutz
Click here to hear the writer read his words:
Caught
I guess I always knew I’d get caught.
What I did was pretty reckless.
Some might say foolhardy.
But nothing much ever happens around here.
I was bored, bored to distraction.
And she distracted me.
Then I had to flee.
Drove for days, hid out near the border.
No use.
I don’t know if I got spotted, or if it was the car.
No matter.
I know what the punishment will be.
There is no way round that.
But I had to do it.
Any last words?
Nah. I’ve nothing to say.
Any regrets?
Well, yes, obviously.
I got caught.
Well put together. Great last line.
Thank you again, Lisa, glad you enjoyed my little cynicism.
Ha! Love his last comment.
Quite the charmer, doncha think?
I really enjoyed this – you’ve created a full character through his voice, and given us enough of the story but enough for our imagination to fill in the spaces. Nicely done
Thank you, sir, I am delighted that it worked so well for you.
👍
Getting caught does rain on one’s parade.
And me with no umbrella.
Very cool – and love the recording to go with it!
Thank you, Jennifer, I am always extra pleased when someone takes the time to listen and comment in addition to reading.
He enjoyed his nefarious activities and then did a runner. Interesting how he’s resigned to being caught though, almost as if part of him wanted to be … Love how you hint at his crimes and leave us to fill in the blanks. Great writing C
Praise from you, Lynn, just makes my day!
Thank you
My absolutely pleasure, dear C. I always look forward to reading your work
He’s a nasty type. Lock him up and throw away the key I say. Love the voice in this. Perfect for the character.
Not much compassion or forgiveness there, Margaret.
La belle dame sans merci, indeed!
Very effective few words..
gramswisewords.blogspot.com
Thank you, Marian
And I can’t access your blog from here. Is this deliberate?
He’s become a desperado out of boredom and seems to enjoy it, except the getting caught bit. He’s resigned to an, ‘oh well, it was good while it lasted.’ Sounds like his crime was something sinister as well. Nicely done.
Thanks, Michael, that was a pretty neat summary
Regrets he has a few. Now he will be singing in the prison I guess.
Only one to mention…
People who commit crimes out of boredom scare me even more than those who murder out of passion or craze. Nothing seems to get to them, no regrets, punishment seems completely pointless. Gives me the chills. Excellent story.
Yes, it is kinda disconcerting, I have to agree
I like those short, fast sentences. Somehow, the structure speaks about his character more that words did.
*than
I am glad it worked for you, thank you
Brilliant stuff, I loved the regret, well you would wouldn’t you?!
Very kind, sir.
And was that a reference to an early 60s court case?
Aah I see, before my time, blissfuly ignorant, that’s me!!
Joy riders always get caught, well you know.
Joy riders? Hmm, interesting
Hahah – I LOVE that last line!
I LOVE that comment!
Getting caught is no-no.
But, we don’t have invisibility cloak!
Interesting story.
Car In Cyclone – Anita
Thanks, Anita
(Quite a strange comment!)
Justice has a way of catching up with one. Near or far from any border.
One way or another, I think that is probably true
He knew he’d get caught and didn’t seem to mind. Completely without remorse. You built the story very well. I really enjoyed, CE.
Thank you, Brenda, I am smiling now!
I came for the voice reading, the voice, and stayed for the story. Both are always a treat. Wonderfully drawn out, CE. Eloquent, chilling, with an edge of sarcasm. Nice!
Okay, Dawn, I am going to marry you.
That is my favourite comment in longer than I can remember (which is sometimes more than 40 minutes)
Well, sir, you’ve got me blushing again. Oh how fun to be back! 😉
Loved the narrative flow. Crime due to boredom…love the premise, Ceayr.
Thanks, Neel, sometimes it just gets too much
I think most people do get caught in the end… if nothing else by a bullet they put to their head… I had an inkling that his crime has to do with the mysterious “she”…
So often it is the ‘she’, Bjorn, or so I have found in my life
You naughty boy, what did you do? Why did you get caught? Did you do something naughtier after fleeing?
You always ask the hard questions, sir!
Sometimes, y’know, things just happen…
Sometimes we do get bored to distraction and do reckless things…
If only he hadn’t got caught
That’s how he feels, exactly!
Great, CE. I’m sure there are quite a few out there whose only regret was getting caught!
Well done.
Best wishes,
Ro
It seemed like a good idea at the time, Ro!
With his luck, he’s sure to find a good-looking female jailer who’ll fall for him and allow him to escape 🙂
Laughing. Ya think?
And his only regret that he got caught…that says more about his character than any of the rest!
Oh don’t you start moralising, Dawn!
Rather a fascinating premise, that a man should commit murder through sheer boredom. Somehow you manage to make it convincing. Well done!
Murder? Who said murder? Hmm, interesting…
One wonders how many other girls distracted him.
Oh, you have a suspicious mind, Linda!
She distracted me. What weight that understatement carries!
Some of us are easily distracted!
Run, run, run…but you cannot hide.
Very true, Stu
Amazing the amount of people who are profoundly sorry only after they have been caught for their crimes and misdemeanours.
That’s the way the world too often is, Iain, full of folk with nae morals
There’s always a rub isn’t there CE?
Ain’t that the truth, Violet
That penultimate line is dripping with sarcasm and irritation. Very good.
Don’t think he is the most sincere of guys, Sandra
Dear CE,
The repetition of knowing he’d get caught ending with ‘I got caught’ works well. Catchy story.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Thank you, m’lady
A bit of a mystery, is he a bank robber or something worse. Yes a bit of a teaser.
Whatever you like, Michael
I liked the way you conveyed a sense of sequence through the monologue. I loved it, but I wouldn’t use “flee” – it doesn’t fit with this voice
Would that make this ‘flee’ a fly in the ointment?
Nah, it wisnae a Scottish flee, it wis mair Shakespearean!
Skedaddle? Scarper? PIck a word, Neil, it’s all good