Friday Fictioneers is hosted by the wonderful Rochelle, the undisputed master of what I call Sound Bite Fiction.
She sets the weekly challenge, and the standard.
Today’s photo is by Shaktiki Sharma, and leaves me as baffled as ever.
Well, it is at least relaxing, I don’t have to think, just write.
The idea, as always, is to write a story of around 100 words based on the picture, below.
Click here to hear me read the story:
Waiting
So tired…
It’s probably the excitement.
I have waited since school for this.
Loved you all these years.
While you wasted your life chasing after him.
When you told me he had dumped you for the last time, that you were finally over him, I was so happy.
tired of waiting…
You were already late when I saw his car, about two hours ago.
Couldn’t see the passenger, she was curled under his arrogant arm.
A song keeps playing in my head.
By Ray Davies, The Kinks.
tired of waiting for you…
Her hair was the same colour as yours.
Footnote:
This is the song, by the vastly underrated Ray Davies, one of the great singer/songwriters of the 1960s:






i feel his pain. I didn’t click on the youtube link but the song is playing in my head, still.
Thanks, Dawn, I rarely do either, and I didn’t this time!
I feel like I’ve lived this story once or twice. Enjoyed The Kinks as well.
I think most of us have
Aye, CE… I think so too
CE, the sad dejectedness of the narrator is palpable. I should have left well enough alone, and not read the Sandra comment… alas, tiger, stripes, and all. 😉 Happy New Year!
Glad you enjoyed the story, Dawn, and I am beginning to wish I had never made that comment! Laughing now, it was just a joke!!!!
Happy New Year!
NO worries… I have a very dry, sarcastic sense of humor. 😉 Happy New Year!
Interesting piece. Was he doing away with this girl he’s in love with, ex-boyfriend and his new girl; or was he telling himself he didn’t recognize the girl when he knew it was the girl he loved. I guess he didn’t love her enough or was driven past the point of no return by his jealousy. Happy New Year CE. Hugs!
Laughing as usual, my lovely Amanda, at your (over-)analysis of the story.
No one did away with anyone this week, he is just lovestruck and a bit stoopid, as most of us have been at times.
New Year hugs to you, sweetheart
Lol. Well you can’t blame me for thinking so lol. New Years hug to you as well CE. Wishing the best in 2017 my friend 🍷😀🎈
Aw, tough stuff here, CE, I felt for your character (although less after reading your reply to Sandra!). I’m glad you left them alive; felt so much stronger for his helplessness
Thank you, glad you felt his pain.
And comment replies are just for ‘Kinky’ fun, not in any way related to the story.
LOL … I love your response to Sandra’s comment. I was thinking the very same thoughts.
But, it’s the holidays. A time to be gentle and all that. NOT … my story is about murder. LOL
I don’t care for waiting. I’m a timely person. I would have been too frustrated to wait for him/ her or anyone. I’ve enjoyed your sultry accent once again. I’m so pleased you’ve continued to add the reading.
Hope your 2017 is filled with wonderful things such as peace, good health and LOVE…
Happy New Year 🎉 Cheers 🍷
Isadora 😎
If you were my only reader, Isadora, I would still post every week, just to read your comment.
Thank you for being here, and for being you.
I will wear this smile just for those comments everyday. It’s a good way for me to stay positive. Thank you, CE. Wouldn’t it be grand if we could all be gentle spirits touching others in kind ways everyday?
Joyfully,
Isadora 😎
Should I dread what has happened to her? This sounds like a crime story to me, about a girl who fell under a psychopath’s spell and then… well, let’s just say that psychopaths do not respond well to being dumped. A great story that could be interpreted so many ways.
By the way, I love The Kinks and saw them in concert when I was a teenager!
I love your interpretation, Sarah, it is great when a reader gives the story a whole new life of its own.
And Kinks are Kool!
“Girl, you really got me goin’, you got me so I don’t know what I’m doin'” he said as he wandered off into the Waterloo sunset.
My tale is called ‘Oh Bother!’
Indeed, Keith!
Waiting – the most dreadful way to spend ones time – and I shall have that song in my head all day, despite not having clivked on your video!
Glad to put a smile on your face, Liz!
Time to move on. Or kill them both (I see from the comments!) and then move on.
No Kinks were hurt in the creation of this story!
His denial was palpable. I hope he’s finally done with her as opposed to finally disposed of her.
Tracey
Yeah, well, but no.
Some people we never quite get over, no matter what
according to henry miller, the best way to get over a woman is to turn her into literature. he should heed his advice. .
He should know, he was married half a dozen times
Sad and lovely music. What’s going on?
Glad you like music, but I don’t get your question, sorry
What? YOU have added the link for a video? 😀
I’m kinda glad he didn’t off them. And it is so sad that he wasted all that time on someone not worthy…
Yes, but I didn’t follow it.
And she was very very worthy
Ha ha!
Reblogged this on Kate McClelland.
You are such a sweetheart, thank you!
Great take, particularly as this is one on my favourite Kinks songs too. In fact one of my previous 100 words was titled Tired of Waiting.
Glad it connected, Michael
The Kinks – a great band. Your story reminds me of crazy “stalking” things when I heard my boyfriend was stepping out with someone else. Thank goodness times got better.
Um, yes, okay, Alicia, I’ll just be…
Bye!
Thanks for the memories, and the warning.
Very welcome, Michael
Wow you can really hear the tone of this piece as it is read. So sad.
Thank you, Joseph, glad you related to it
Poor bloke! The despondency is vivid. Love the follow up in reply to Sandra too!
Thanks, Clare.
And we are allowed to have fun after school (or 100 words), aren’t we!
This could work as a part one to many of your slash and murder stories from the past… But I’m fine with not knowing what the narrator’s next step might be.
There is no next step, Bjorn it is a 100 word story.
Cheers
Love the longing here, C, the yearning so strong and him still holding on for her. Very strong emotionally.
Adore the Kinks and as writers, they’re a special band – the lyrics are just superb. Days always makes me sad in a good way and who doesn’t love Sunny Afternoon? – My girlfriend’s run off with my car, gone back to ther Ma and Pa, telling tales of drunkenness and cruelty. Genius.
Hope you had a great Christmas – Bonne Annee
Thanks, Lynn, I am happy that you got so much out of my 100 words.
And yes, Ray Davies is an exceptional talent, and I always felt the girlfriend was just a tad picky!
Bonne année a toi, et ta famille
Great story – a little tragedy.
As far as Sunny Afternoon goes, I think women have put up with more for less reward, though the protagonist is clearly a lot less attractive when he loses his money – funny how that happens 🙂
Thank you. May 2017 be kind to us all
Thanks so much for this post…the story, the song and being able to hear your voice. I really loved and related to your story. Most of us have some unfinished business from the past and I know when Facebook came out, a number of people got back in touch with all sorts from the past. A friend of mine rekindled an old flame as they were both single. Being married myself, I didn’t go there and there are people I’ve left alone. Sometimes you can move forward as friends and other times, it’s not possible. It would be a good story to pursue further.
xx Rowena
Wow, thanks, Rowena, this really worked for you, didn’t it?
That is so rewarding, as I am sure you know, I am all big grins now.
Hugs
He who grins wins. Also works the other way. All the best for the New Year. \xx Rowena
My favorite Kinks song. Just out of curiosity, is her name LOLA? Nicely done. Good to read a piece from you that doesn’t wind up with somebody getting killed 😉
Thank you, but I don’t always kill someone.
Not always 😉
Dear C.E.
I had to listen to the whole song before commenting. Loved the Kinks. I am a bit surprised that the narrator hasn’t offed the two of them in the car. Lots of longing in this story. Nicely done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Great musician, great song.
And see my reply to Sandra, below!
So tired. Sometimes I thought I was wasting my time waiting for some girl to “get wise” to the guy she was hooked up with. I was, actually. Lessons learned.
You have me hooked on listening. That voice of yours is great, CE. Like I said, it’s a treat in America to hear a good Scottish accent. I was probably all of three or four when The Kinks’ You Really Got Me was heard on the radio. They’re a classic group here in the States, too, you know.
Five out of five Come Dancin’s (my age group’s music) 😉
You are too kind, Kent.
5 out of 5 Sunny Afternoons.
😉
Clever story inspired by the photo. I’m happy you included a song. 🙂
I have a question, dear Anja.
Why not come dancing, it’s only natural?
And when they said come dancing,
I always did.
Hello Anja… such a long time… come dance again.
I’ve started dancing again. 🙂
You’ve been missed Anja! Come back and play! 🙂 And Happy New Year!
I am trying. I have been writing a lot this past week. Happy New Year to you.
The sadness and frustration comes through so strongly in this piece! I really felt the pain of the narrator. Well done!
Thank you, Jessie
I heard Ray Davies in my head as I read
One of the greats.
I’m amazed your character didn’t immediately despatch them both to the after-life, or are you turning over a new leaf? I was happy to revisit Ray Davies and the Kinks; my favourite was Waterloo Sunset.
Only 100 words, Sandra.
101 – 137 might have read:
I hurry home, sharpen my machete.
Track you and your ‘ex-beau’ to the local palais.
Slash and chop All Day and All of the Night..
Tell Sergeant Lola ‘I killed Terry and Julie.
You really got me.’
Touché.