Friday Fictioneers is hosted by the wonderful Rochelle, the undisputed master of what I call Sound Bite Fiction.
She sets the weekly challenge, and the standard.
Today’s photo by Janet Webb took me to a dark place when I first saw it back in 2013, and the resulting story found its way into my great book, Medville Matters, published last summer.
Did I already mention that it is available here, on this blog, over in the right hand column?
I have tweaked it this time, to hopefully freshen it up.
The idea, as always, is to write a story of around 100 words based on the picture, below.
The Job
The sum that they offer is incredible.
For them money is no object.
They give me very detailed specifications.
I know exactly what I need and where to find it.
I get half of the money now and the balance on delivery.
I know they will pay.
I know they have a requirement for a continuous supply of product.
This is just the first job.
I wait in the supermarket car-park.
I watch her put her blonde three-year old in the SUV.
I put the cloth over her mouth and roll her under the car.
Walk away with a golden-haired fortune.
Far too many atrocities are justified with, “It’s just a job.” Maybe your guy is selling to mine.
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Terrifying and so real. Good writing for dark actions.
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Yikes. Shocking piece. Interesting scenario and well told.
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Extremely dark and good writing, C.E. Yes, there are plenty of slimy, greedy creatures at both ends of that business. May they all end up behind bars in the prison general population with inmates who hate that type of crime. I don’t believe all the hangings reported in prisons are suicides. I know the knifings aren’t. I also seriously doubt most of the guards care. —- Suzanne
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Nicely done. Dark one indeed. But if only it was so easy to walk away with a quiet three old. Obviously fictional 😉
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Oo what a horrible character you’ve created. He’s so cold about it all – I think you’ve captured the iciness such people and others with similar ‘jobs’ must have. Brilliant story, CE.
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That is a dark place you went to. I like the lack of emotion the person is showing (well, not exactly “like”, you know what I mean!).
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Gruesome!
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Cool!
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Ha, you’re a fine one to complain about profiling of shopping carts. Is that what you used for your getaway vehicle?
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Nah, hitched a ride from a passing mermaid…
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I agree with the others on the creepiness. The sad thing is that there is a demand there, and when it comes to trafficking, human beings rank number three, after drugs and arms. It’s worse when people sell or take advantage of their own relatives.
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There are people who do anything for money.
Thank you for your comment.
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That seems to be the way of it. Dark and effective, as someone mentioned before. Wow.
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I like Wow, thank you, sir
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And that’s how easily it happens. Awful tale, but well told.
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Sadly it does.
Thank you.
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Dude, you’re gonna spoil me with that awesome recording. Which is good, you should continue doing it for the blog. I think it helps overall. As for the story, nice and dark.
Five out of five pink elephants.
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Yeah, the reading distracts attention from the writing!
And I only have one pink elephant, he is way more than enough…
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Well, keep going with the recordings anyway. They’re very enjoyable.
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Amazing Imagery, dark but breathtaking. Wowza-great job!
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Oh I like Wowza!
Glad you enjoyed.
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Dark and effective 🙂
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Thank you.
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Such an awful tale. Human trafficking? I hope someone finds her 3-year-old soon. Great writing CE.
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It’s okay, Amanda, it’s just a story, honest!
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Horrid person.
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Yeah, well, a guy has to earn a crust.
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Wow, that was a heart-breaker i did not see coming!
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Thanks, Dawn, I do try to surprise you!
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The writer has been taking some serious flack. We should all be looking out for our own and our neighbour’s!! Scary, scary, scary story!! And all to real. I did some volunteer work at an orphanage some time ago and we had two kids rescued from slave traders! It takes a shock sometimes to wake one up.
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Thank you for your visit and your comment.
Although I confess that I do not understand all of what you say, I very much appreciate your time.
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My mind was leaping to all sorts of conclusions but you caught me by surprise.
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Remember my strap line:
where nothing is quite what it seems
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I’m sure CE is a former, or perhaps even a current, hit-man for the Triads.
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I think you might be geographically challenged, Paul!
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Suitably dark. Remind me not to contradict you if we meet one day!
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You are safe, sir, but do not let Graham annoy me, please.
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Not nice, I put Inspector Johnson on the case.🙂
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I think I didn’t understand this conversation the last time.
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Oh no! Scary stuff. Great story.
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Scary is good, thank you!
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I was thinking about jewels, assassination, anything, but not child trafficking. Great and horrible twist, very dark, very good.
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I don’t like to be too obvious.
Glad you enjoyed.
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Oh, the last line tells it all. Gave me the chills. Well done.
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I’m not really replying, just adding on. I listened to you read this! You have such a lovely accent!
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Chills are good!
Thank you for the kind words about the reading, my accent just is what it is!
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Oh my, that was dark. Incredible writing.
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Very happy with that, thank you.
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Genuinely creepy!
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Thank you, sir
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Dear CE,
Everyone has a darker side, but I think you’ve taken yours to a new level. Well constructed story but such a disturbing ending. Well done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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And in real life I am such a sweetheart.
Thank you, m’lady.
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Oh, this is wonderfully dark. Beautifully terrifying.
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That works for me, Claire!
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And you called me dark! I love the structure here, the way you lay the foundations, give us hints to what your man’s going to do, that it’s illegal, that there will be an endless demand for the product. The shocker is what that ‘product’ is. The way your man talks about the girl as if she is just a commodity – chilling.
I agree with Sandra. That line is a cracker.
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Thank you, Lynn, glad it worked for you.
And I like that line too.
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A great line indeed 🙂
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Gritty
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Thanks, Neil
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That was indeed a dark one. The line “golden-haired fortune” is a corker – stopped me in my tracks. You do this so well, I’d hesitate to meet you on a dark night in Marseille. Or anywhere for that matter.
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Thank you for your kind words, Sandra.
Isn’t it a great feeling when you find exactly what you want to say?
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