AnElephantCant find any inspiration
His problems this week are rapidly mounting
But he girds his loins
Finds some coins
And throws them into the fountain
Once again it is Friday Fictioneer time.
Fairy Godmother Rochelle makes dreams come true for wistful weavers of fantastic fiction.
And AnElephant falls down the well.
The idea is to write a very short story, circa 100 words, based on this picture prompt (below).
That’s it.
Copyright Rachel Bjerke
The Wish
He sits gently rubbing her stomach.
Look, Rab, he says, your new sister is getting restless in Mummy’s tummy.
The little boy clambers up, grinning happily.
Baby, he says, laying his face against his mother’s stomach.
Not long now, she says, stroking his hair, then Mummy can play again, we’ll have lots of fun.
She looks around their tiny bed-sit.
I wish we had more room, she says to her husband, I’d give absolutely anything for a little more space.
The doctor looks at them with tired eyes.
It is very advanced, he says.
Your son has only weeks to live.
A nice story with a surprise sad ending. 🙁
Lily
Thank you, Lily, AnElephant hopes you enjoyed it.
And welcomes you to his shaky house of words.
I’d give absolutely anything to know where you get these ideas.
Nooooooo I didn’t mean that!
AnElephant chuckles at your comment.
Thank you.
Man, that’s sad! Good job
Thank you, and welcome to AnElephant’s little corner of the big fictional world.
A lovely scene of hope and love, and then heartbreak. Well delivered.
AnElephant thanks Margaret for her praise.
Oof! What a twist. Be careful what you ask for. You just might get it!
So true, Joe, so very true.
Oh, the saddest tale so far. It happens. Life can deal some cruel cards. I hope there is a miracle of science – or faith – and the boy lives. There are some good cards dealt, sometimes. It does happen. Your story could go either way, beyond the cliffhanger. 🙂
Keep on hoping, dear lady, but AnElephant has no more words to tell the rest of this increasingly harrowing tale.
Thank you for visiting 🙂
ah, the carelessness of a wish! So well done.
Yeah, well, that’s life!
Glad you enjoyed.
Very sad ending but beautifully written.
Thank you, my dear friend.
Lovely to see you here again.
Oh, the pain of these words. I am heart broken. The ending made me shake. Powerful in every way.
AnElephant does not want to break the lovely lady’s heart.
It is just a wee story, honestly!
Whew … I’m pleased then. : )
Dear Elephant,
A well-written tale. I admit I reread the first bit after I read the ending and then reread the ending a few times. Is the mother’s wish the reason for the child’s illness? I’d rather go with the old Russian tale about the wise man who had a housewife bring a goat, horse, chicken, etc., into the house. When the livestock was evacuated, the tiny home felt big indeed.
As to the Monkey’s Paw–Edgar Allen Poe has a story about that nefarious wish granter as well. Creepy stuff.
All my best,
Marie Gail
Thank you for your considered comments, Marie Gail.
AnElephant is happy that you prefer the old tale of the overcrowded home, which is so much more elegant than his poor offering.
And he is flattered that Mr Poe is mentioned on his blog.
What a twist! I feel horrible for that little boy, can’t believe he won’t be meeting his little sister, and she will never know her big brother. ):
AnElephant does not want the lovely lady to feel horrible, so he tells her a secret.
It is just a story.
Sure didn’t see that one coming…went from Aesop to Stephen King. Well-written…and I LOVE THE VERSE IN THE BEGINNING…GIRD HIS LOINS – THREW SOME COINS…paraphrasing but love your lightness. It’s heart-warming.
AnElephant tries to entertain.
He is as happy as a happy hippo that the lovely lady enjoys his effort.
She does indeed.
Oh, dear. The gods of the fountain took their wish too literally!
Well written…wraps tightly around my heart.
Oh Jan, these gods, eh, whatcha gonna do?
AnElephant hopes your lovely heart is okay.
Oh, this one really hurt my heart. Such promise in the beginning, just to have it ripped away at the end.
So sad. Well done.
AnElephant is distraught to hurt Rachel’s heart.
He has a spare hug for her.
Dear AEC,
Be careful what you wish for, right. Sad story well told. In the end no change in the room they have, but another level of despair built on top of their cares. Well done.
Aloha,
Doug
Thanks, Doug.
AnElephant recalls The Monkey’s Paw, a tale by WW Jacobs, which has a similar theme.
What a tragic twist to this. Very well-written. I like the muted effect of no quotation marks.
-David
Thank you, David.
AnElephant likes to think that both his readers can follow his little tale with minimal punctuation.
The poor woman!
She is lucky AnElephant has only 100 words or he wipes out her family for generations to come!
LOL…you are so bad!
I love it!
Very sad indeed. “Be careful what you wish for.” A ‘punch in the gut’ ending. Beautifully written.
AnElephant loves any comment with the words ‘Beautifully written’.
Hugs to Joy.
I don’t lie. 🙂 🙂 It is beautifully written.
AnElephant jumps for Joy at this Priceless comment.
Mammoth hugs.
I enjoy reading your stories elephant! Keep writing!
((Hugs!!)) xoxo
Very sad indeed but I remain somewhat buoyed with my image of AnElephantCant
with “girded loins”.
Thank you for that.
Behave yourself, woman, AnElephant’s loins – girded or otherwise – are not a fit topic for a married lady.
Cheers, Bon.
Whats happens in my mind stays girded in my mind. Promise.
I have woken the dogs from their morning nap with my yowl and you are not here to walk them for me… Not a happy reader right now, but such an excellent flash I must forgive you. Very well done.
AnElephant awaits an invitation, unless the dogs are big and snarly, of course.
And he appreciates your forgiveness.
This is heartbreaking…but beautifully written.
AnElephant is always happy to break a heart or two.
Thank you.
This is even worse after reading Bjorn’s story just prior to reading yours. The line about giving anything for a little more space is, in light of the last lines, almost too much to bear. Wonderful! You girded your loins admirably!
janet
AnElephant thanks you for your kind words.
But he does not wish to discuss loin-girding with the lovely lady.
A powerfully sad story, bitterly so in fact. Well done.
Thanks, Sandra, a nightmare scenario.
What’s all the space in the world worth without life..without someone to play with…………..like the wasted fireplaces in the picture…Beautiful and touching story!
AnElephant thanks you for your generous praise.
Be careful what you wish for…
Once more my heart sank with that awful ending.
But, as always,very well told.
Merci, cherie.
Tu as ramene ton coeur a la surface?
Yup. Blowing bubbles now.
There’s a kick in the teeth. So sad.
Hmm, a bit upsetting, for sure.
I feel like I’ve been stabbed! I didn’t see that coming.
AnElephant is always happy to surprise his reader.
Sorry about the stabbing.
nicely told.
Thank you.
Dear Elephant,
Oh dear, already I see that this prompt is inspiring some very sad stories. As a mother, the thought of losing a child and such a young one, is unfathomable. Very well crafted and told.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Thank you, Rochelle.
We all live in the hope it never happens to us.
Oh. this is very sad.. so sad… A new daughter but a son that’s lost.. and such an awful way for a wish to come true.
Thanks for visiting, Bjorn, sorry you got so sad!