Death – Six Sentence Story

Artwork by Phil Burns

This challenge is produced by GirlieOnTheEdge with the following simple rules:
Write 6 Sentences. No more. No less.
Use the current week’s prompt word – BOWL

Click here to hear the author read his words:

Death

The night that Death came we were all sitting round the table at Sunday dinner.
He wasn’t what I expected, not at all like Monty Python’s cowled skeleton with a scythe, just a nondescript wee man in a grey nondescript suit, although he had about him, I admit, a certain gravitas and an air of finality.
He studied each of us in turn, with a seemingly regretful shake of his head, then paused when he reached Grandma.
He nodded, she nodded back and sighed, but when she asked if she had time to get ready he said nothing, so she put her spoon into her unfinished bowl of jelly and ice cream, vanilla with raspberry sauce, coughed politely to excuse herself from the table, stood, and went to get her coat.
He waited for a few moments, while we looked somewhat awkwardly at each other (small talk seemed rather inappropriate, even Auntie Annie ceased her inane wittering, a small blessing given the circumstances) but carefully not at him, and then he followed her.
We never saw either of them again, but I guess it’s just a question of time.

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28 Responses to Death – Six Sentence Story

  1. The Last Supper reimagined. Jelly, ice cream. raspberry and vanilla sauce. I only hope I’ll get chocolate sauce.

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  2. A clever and very skillful six. These are the kinds of sentences that can be made into a much longer teleplay. Reading it I had a twilght zoney feeling. The fourth sentence was my favorite.

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  3. Terveen Gill says:

    What a creative take. So simple and calm yet emits chilling vibes. Well written. 🙂

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  4. clark says:

    Am in agreement with the others (other than the Monty-philia).

    Quite the scene, (in the common and everyday sense), it brings home the simplest of ideas: all the encouragement and support those around us offer, as the un-surprising surprise guest approaches, we all leave with him/her/it, very much alone and on. our own.

    Thoughtful Six.

    (the one line I did enjoy in all the films had to do with knights and a rabbit and the line, ‘Run away! Run away!’)

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  5. Indeed, quite an interesting scene. Death certainly has a solemnity about it.

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  6. Frank Hubeny says:

    The phrase “Auntie Annie ceased her inane wittering” made me wonder what “wittering” was, but I think I know. It is only a matter of time.

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  7. Chris Hall says:

    Perfect! What a wonderful way to go, so civilised! I really liked the way the small simple details contrast with the enormity of the scene.
    And of course, Monty Python… to die for??

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  8. I quite like this story, C.E.. Would that death be so polite and patient!
    “…just a nondescript wee man in a grey nondescript suit,…”
    And Monty Python. Who doesn’t love them! 😁

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  9. Liz H says:

    Quite creepy in its description of the ordinary, leave taking in a extraordinary circumstance that waits for us all.
    My we all be as genteel as Grandma.

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  10. Really liked this piece, and the portrayal of Death in this way.

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  11. Brilliant! Indeed, just a question of time. I like how Death is nondescript here, and that he only takes Grandma. The recording clip gave it an extra depth!
    Loved the line: “even Auntie Annie ceased her inane wittering” 🙂
    The Meaning of Life is my fave Monty Python film, and the Death scene is a big standout.

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  12. jenne49 says:

    Brilliant.
    Understated, matter-of-fact – the homely details, and Aunt Annie! – and still expressing fully our journey with death.
    ‘He nodded, she nodded back and sighed…’ I’ve seen this in an old man approaching death – or should I say, as your story does, approached by death?
    And the last line…
    Just brilliant

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  13. What a way to go. I hope it’s like that for me.

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