Hello Again – Friday Fictioneers

Friday Fictioneers is hosted by the wonderful Rochelle, the undisputed master of what I call Sound Bite Fiction.
She sets the weekly challenge, and the standard.
T
his week’s somewhat austere photo comes courtesy of Roger Bultot and, as I am struggling for time again, provides me with the opportunity to recycle a piece from more than 5 years ago.
The idea, as always, is to write a story of around 100 words based on this picture, below.

© Roger Bultot


Click here to hear the writer read his words:

Hello Again

She hasn’t seen him for years and is really looking forward to it.
They spent twenty years together, raised two children.
One of whom couldn’t be bothered to make the trip today.
But their daughter is with her, although perhaps not quite so exuberant.
Still, she feels good, hopes she looks good, wants to be at her best for the big moment.
Her legs are elegantly crossed in her tailored suit and expensive high heels.
She chats happily to the people around her.
She stands and smoothes her skirt before stepping forward.
Then she smiles radiantly into the open coffin.

About ceayr

A Scot who has discovered Paradise in a small town he calls Medville on the Côte d'Azur, C.E. Ayr has spent a large part of his life in the West of Scotland and a large part elsewhere. His first job was selling programmes at his local football club and he has since tried 73 other career paths, the longest being in IT, with varying degrees of success. He is somewhat nomadic, fairly irresponsible and, according to his darling daughter, a bit random.
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77 Responses to Hello Again – Friday Fictioneers

  1. Well, I agree with the other comments. He couldn’t have been a great husband or father.

    Like

  2. Margaret says:

    That was a surprise ending. I really would like to know why she’s so very upbeat, even if he was a cad. Intriguing.

    Like

  3. Quite a story, C.E. She doesn’t seem too unhappy about his death. It sounds like he left her years before and she’s done just fine. A great ending. —- Suzanne

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  4. Brilliant … I loved the ending!

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  5. Sounds like it couldn’t have happened to a nicer guy.

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  6. Wow…awesome…I was not expecting THAT!

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  7. I was ready for the twist, and so enjoyed the detailed build up. It’s all in the delivery!

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  8. Gouy Corine says:

    Un pur moment de bonheur ton histoire !
    😍🤗😂😂 ❤

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  9. James McEwan says:

    Yes, I understand that. Just don’t call his other ex a horse…

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  10. draliman says:

    Ha, a joyful occasion for her and a nice day out to boot 🙂

    Like

  11. LOVED hearing you read your story!
    Ronda

    Like

  12. Now she is really free. I’m assuming he wasn’t the nicest guy, since one of the kids didn’t even show up. So good for her!! I like this lady a lot!

    -Rachel

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  13. I too was lulled into a lovely scene. Daughter. Lovely dress. Stockings. Heels. Then, as usual, you ended the story with a punch. Well done.

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  14. I guess appearance is all-important especially when there’s a crowd watching. I’m surprised the daughter is standing anywhere near her. I bet they leave in separate cars. Families?

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  15. …and he smiled back! Woooo! Nice one.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Abhijit Ray says:

    What a twist you brought in the end, sir! Brilliant! He must have tormented her and the kids, no wonder she feels happy.

    Like

  17. Dear CE,

    Not the grieving widow, I take it. Nicely done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Like

  18. One of the kids couldn’t be bothered to come shows perhaps the death was a blessing for them. Good stuff

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  19. You led us along nicely, C.E.
    And all the while the body was right in front of us.
    You clever dog.

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  20. michael1148humphris says:

    A cracking ending sir.

    Like

  21. 4963andypop says:

    I had a little foreboding that it might involve death, can’t imagine why…I actually did have the image of a soldier’s funeral upon returning in body only, about half-way through. But the smile was incomprehensible. I have a feeling there is more to this story.

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  22. Tessa says:

    I was lulled by the lovely accent and the words seemed harmless enough and I had to go to the comments to finally understand the story. I certainly wasn’t expecting that although I suppose I should from your work. Another great one!

    Like

    • ceayr says:

      Thank you, Tessa, although I am disappointed that my story wasn’t clear.
      100 words is not a lot, sometimes.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Tessa says:

        I sometimes just don’t get it and need it pointed out. It made perfect sense once I knew what it was referring to and yes 100 words is not a lot at times. I’ve written shorter fiction and that is even harder to make it make sense.

        Like

  23. Nobbinmaug says:

    Ooh, that’s a good one. I did not expect the end at all. She seems a little too happy about seeing him in that state. I guess we know why they haven’t seen each other for years.

    Like

  24. Jelli says:

    Wow! That is full of power and might. Great write!

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  25. Jade Li says:

    I felt the ticking of the clock — attached to the bomb. Wasn’t expecting that bang though.

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  26. You think I have learned my lesson by now, but “No” I still fall for it, each and every time. Of course, it wasn’t a wedding. Will I ever learn?

    Like

  27. gahlearner says:

    A-hahaha. That got a loud, pleasantly surprised laugh out of me. Wonderful descriptions and a great dark fun twist.

    Like

  28. Liz Young says:

    Oh dear – after what happened to that woman who went to Dubai for her ex’s funeral, this could end badly!

    Like

  29. granonine says:

    Is she looking at his very decomposed body? If so, she certainly has a taste for the macabre. But–maybe there’s no corpse? Or maybe she just escaped from the loony bin?

    Like

  30. Violet Lentz says:

    And here I was thinking being married to her sent him running for the cloister…. Excellent twist, CE.

    Like

  31. trentpmcd says:

    Cold. Of course, since the son couldn’t be bothered to show up, perhaps he deserved it…

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  32. She surely knows how to live it up, even for the dead.
    Loved this story, Ceayr.

    Like

  33. Iain Kelly says:

    A happy farewell for her. I did wonder if she was somehow responsible for putting him in the coffin, but then she hasn’t seen him for years… or so she claims.

    Like

  34. Oh boy!
    What an end!
    Awesome! 😀

    Like

  35. Varad says:

    Whether she is happy for the life he lived, or his demise we can only wonder! Well done, CE

    Like

  36. neilmacdon says:

    Nice twist, mate

    Like

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