Friday Fictioneers is hosted by the wonderful Rochelle, the undisputed master of what I call Sound Bite Fiction.
She sets the weekly challenge, and the standard.
This week’s prompt was contributed by J Hardy Carroll, and took me back to my school-days, interesting times for all involved.
The idea, as always, is to write a story of around 100 words based on the picture, below.
© J Hardy Carroll
Click here to hear the author read the story:
Suspended
Hi, Mum, it’s me, I’ve been suspended again.
Showing a lack of respect to my teacher and my environment, they say.
My English teacher, we were discussing proverbs, aphorisms and stuff.
It’s kinda like an old saying, good advice but snappy, funny.
Like, um, Don’t count your chickens before they hatch, or Don’t judge a book, blah blah.
Yeah, they’re pretty clichéd, but we had to come up with our own thingy, something that might be useful to know.
Well, I remembered what grandpa used to tell me when I was younger, so I used that.
Don’t eat yellow snow.
Nice one. Grandpa had sound advice, the teacher needs to be re-educated.
Thank you
LOL
Right back at you
Like Neil, I laughed then laughed some more. Now, I’ve got that damned Frank Zappa song stuck in my head, “Watch out where those huskies go, don’t you eat that yellow snow . . . “
You, too, huh? 😀
Ignore him, he’s just trying to be cool
Like Frank, I sang then sang some more ‘Don’t be a naughty Eskimo…’
Good one! You read it well, too. There was that smirk in the voice that made it abundantly clear why you’d been suspended!
Thanks, Penny, I tried, but gave up trying to read it without a grin in the voice.
Sound advice through sound bite fiction. 🙂
Praise joyfully accepted from justjoyfulness
Yeah… that is a good tip!! Lol! We had a pay phone in our school too. God I’m old.. 😂
Even the senile old fool knows that much!
And you’re not old, just slightly used, worn, battered, scratched, tatty around the edges, nothing to worry about
Ha ha!😜
But that’s the best advice! Like ‘don’t make necklaces out of stinging nettles’ or ‘don’t practice handstands in a field of cowpats’. Invaluable, sensible advice.
Love the speech of your MC – very natural and good characterisation. Great stuff
Your second example has me rolling my eyes instead of my Rs.
Thanks for kind words.
My pleasure 🙂
Laughing. Sounds like good advice to me!
Happy you enjoyed, ma’am
Charming and funny. I think I now see where a certain “elephant” was born, or more like “how” it was born.
Good to see you back, C.E. You’ve been missed! Hope things are going well for you.
Thanks, Quortleplinker, he actually wrote the first three drafts of this before I sent him back to the zoo.
I’m fine, thanks, just different life priorities
Someone definitely is lacking in a sense of humour and my guess is as good as yours. Great story, Ceayr.
Thanks, Neel, glad you enjoyed
Haha! Absolutely brilliant. Yellow snow is definitely to be avoided
Click to read my FriFic
Thanks, Keith
first it made me squirm and then laugh.
http://ideasolsi65.blogspot.in/2017/07/the-sunday-call.html
I can settle for a squirm and a laugh
Hahaha! This was great CE. The cheeky bugger was right in his own way. Too bad the staff couldn’t see the funny side.
Happy you got a chuckle, Varad
Good one. I’d have thought the teacher’d laugh. Maybe the Board should suspend ‘Sir’ for lack of sense?
Many teachers seemed to have humour bypasses during my glorious scholastic career
Poor kid, in the smog bound days of my youth, all snow was a toxic yellow
Yes, Michael, but toxic is relatively harmless!
Nicely done.
hehehehe
Thank you.
hahaha
Brilliant. At least the granddad’s advice was sensible. In a similar situation a friend’s son repeated this piece of advice given to him by said friend: “Never trust a man who tucks his shirt in his underpants”. What?!?
A la John Major, as the revolting Ms Currie revealed to an indifferent world
I’m pretty sure my friend was handing out that advice before Miss Egg Marketing Board 1988 made her revelation about John Major’s hidden bits, which leaves me wondering whether and how he had inside information about the flaccid Member for Huntingdon.
“Flaccid” based on impression JM gave. I assume Edwina would disagree, based on her experience. Plus, he was the standing Member at the relevant time.
Or worse, don’t eat the chocolate snow, either. LOL!
Yuck! 😛
As Varad says, Jelli
It is not easy to lower the tone here, but you did it with ease.
That was too funny… Here I was thinking what did that child do? (Having a boy who was suspended more than once…)
I was that soldier
Somehow I am mot surprised…😉
Thanks for the laugh. It’s always good advice.
Happy to amuse, Sascha
Sound advice actually.
Unless…
Suspended for saying THAT?! In this day and age, wouldn’t be surprising. Well done, C.E. I like it!
Fiction, dear boy, fiction. Glad you liked
Grandpa was a wise old bird.
He learnt the hard way
It’s often the case. People who have it easy have very little to tell.
Now there’s some good advice to pass onto my kids. My son is actually going skiing with school in a few weeks. I’ll add that to wear your deodorant and shower daily.
xx Rowena
You’re a wonderful mother, Rowena!
Thanks very much. I really appreciate and often need the encouragement.
xx Rowena
Crazy lady.
My favourite kind!
A very fun story though not-so-fun for the parent and really liked the matching ‘lingo’
Thanks. Still talk that way, y’know.
I was grinning into a laugh. Nearly, nearly, got me there. Probably would have if I didn’t have childhood memories of actually eating handfuls of the yellow stuff.
Not the smartest, hmm, Kelvin. I am happy with ‘grinning’
Yes, you do the funnies!
You know, I gave the same advice to my son… not sure he listened though.
That explains a lot!
Suspended is harsh, but I suspect it’s not his first misdemeanor. Good fun CE.
Repeat offender, Iain
I’m giggling on my way to lunch now. Good to see you back on here, CE.
Happy to amuse, Sandra, and thank you.
Dear CE,
That phone call is disturbingly similar to conversations with my youngest son who spent more time being suspended that in school. The miracle was that he actually finished high school. The best stories are the ones we relate to, aren’t they. Good one.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Thank you, ma’am
My grandfather used to say the same thing. Gosh if they really suspended kids for that these days nobody would be in school.
Just a story, Joseph, although some punishments seemed extreme to me in my time
I laughed, CE, I laughed
I’m glad, Neil, I’m glad