Friday Fictioneers is hosted by the wonderful Rochelle, the undisputed master of what I call Sound Bite Fiction.
She sets the weekly challenge, and the standard.
Today’s photo by Rich Voza first appeared in February 2013 when I was travelling in the Pacific North West, where I met some of the most beautiful and wonderful people it has ever been my privilege and joy to encounter.
You know who you are, and you know I love you.
My story was only my second for Friday Fictioneers, and it was back when my alter ego introduced all his writing with a somewhat bizarre rhyme.
The original story appeared here.
It then appeared in today’s very slightly amended version, on page 32 of my must-have book, Medville Matters, available over there on the right hand column>>>
See?
And yes, you can buy an e-book too; The Second Request is perfect for your summer e-reading.
Anyway, back to reality, or fiction as we call it.
The idea, as always, is to write a story of around 100 words based on the picture, below.
Aeroplane
The last few people shuffle past, or stop before her, hoisting their baggage into the overheads.
The seat beside her lies empty.
She wonders if it will still be empty when they depart.
Everyone has settled.
A man appears, ambling, insouciant.
He grins and says something to the uniformed lady who approaches him sternly.
Her rebuke becomes a pink-cheeked giggle.
He stops where she sits and somehow squeezes his bag into a space above his head.
Her irritation increases.
Hi, he says.
Her anger melts away instantly.
She is enchanted by his voice and his accent.
I got that book you wanted.
A man with a great voice, an interesting accent and who brings a book: what’s not to love? If this is one of your first ffs,it doesn’t show (except for the lack of sinister). Reading feels like being in that scene.
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Winter (in the southern sphere) is making me dull. I had to read it again to get why there was an empty seat beside her. At least he makes her happy.
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They don’t leave folk standing in planes here in the north.
Even chaps like him are allowed a place to park their bahookies.
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You’ve painted a complete and satisfying picture of these two and their relationship in this scene. Brilliantly done.
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What can I say, Margaret, except thank you.
As I have said, I was surprised and delighted at the reaction to this story, only my second for FF, when it first appeared.
And it was people like yourself, with such generous praise, who inspired me to continue.
And the lady behind the story was an inspiration in herself.
Hugs and thanks
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excellent imagery!
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Merci, Madame, tu es trop gentille.
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De rein, mon ami.
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Since my own brother was extremely handsome and could be a charmer, although deeply troubled by alcoholism, I was immune to that type early in my life. It could be this guy means well, though. I always try not to jump to conclusions. Well written, C.E. 🙂 — Suzanne
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Thank you, Suzanne, for your thoughts and your praise.
In this situation he does mean well.
And I agree, conclusions are best left unjumped!
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Very good. Everyone’s already said it. It’s great character and emotion depiction
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Thanks, Mick, much appreciated.
As I say in my intro, this was only my second story for FF and I had no idea what I was doing.
The response then, as now, and to my surprise, was hugely encouraging.
It is probably a major reason that I stuck with this genre, which was totally new to me and quite intimidating.
Cheers
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Insouciant is a new word for me. Thanks for that.
I, for one miss anelephant and his charming rhymes.
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I will pass on your message to the Big Pink One.
It is, after all, his story, originally.
But he is a bit of a big head, so let’s not say too much, okay?
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I hope the book wasn’t fifty shades of grey!
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Oh, Angie, I like to think we are better than that, you and I!
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I sure hope so!
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It’s so hard to stay mad at a tall, handsome man bearing gifts 🙂
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I bow to your superior knowledge of such things!
And thank you again for visiting and commenting, lovely to see you here again.
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I got such a strong sense of his character – a charmer, obviously, but one I think that might not be so good for the narrator in the end.
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Laughing here, Claire, I suspect you are not an easy lady to charm!
Thank you for visiting and sharing your thoughts, always a pleasure to see you.
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To add to everyone’s comment, I think he was insouciant because he did something for her, something she wanted!
I should know, for I am married to one such person. My heart melts because of the care that made him late!
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What a lovely comment.
Thank you, I don’t get many of these!
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Charmers make the world. Bringing smiles and giggles is a gift. Enjoyable!
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You have been watching Graham in action, I think!
Happy you enjoyed.
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Thanks. Graham and I are wondering how you are doing and if you are better now
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Love this character. The exchange with the uniformed lady is great.
Interesting last line that makes me want to read more. I’m wondering if back then you did continue the story with the next prompt? Cool idea!
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Nope, no follow up, and he finally got deported.
But he did at least wreak some havoc in the meantime.
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A charmer!
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One tries!
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“Just when the every day irritation threatens to smother me (or him) he remembers my favorite book and I am lost to him again.”
I always say this and I love your prose. Hey are your books for sale?
Tracey
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No you don’t always say that, sometimes you terrorise me with talk of grinding bones.
And are you really trying to wind me up?
Does no one ever notice all the stuff plastered down the right hand side of this page every jolly week?
I think I will go sell peanuts to AnElephant (pink) on the beach.
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Ha ha, you were such an easy target today. I’ll download a book or two straight away.
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Got to be honest and say I don’t get the last sentence. However, that’s more a crit of me than you…lol.
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He was late, but indifferent (or insouciant), because he bought her a present.
And that was the sentence I amended!
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Very relaxed if not souciant. Now that’s a word I do not think I seen before.
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I like insouciant, it is a popular word back in darkest Glasgow.
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I always loved that spelling. Aeroplane. Aerodrome.
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Yes, I suppose correct spelling must be refreshing to you chaps.
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He seems nice, does he train people too?
Love the story.
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He tries to be nice, but he could not train a carrot.
Glad you enjoyed!
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🙂
🙂
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He is certainly a charmer. Voice and accent does the trick so often. Now, take Sean Connery…
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Well, Mishter Prinshloo, now you come to menshun it…
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Amended versions are, as always, a good thing. Mine is slightly this week. Even between alter-egos, there is always that high degree of quality. By the way, i miss those delightful poems of yours. 😉
Be well, my friend! 🙂
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Laughing.
Thank you, sir, for your kind words, but you really need to check out lovely Sandra’s comment below!
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I did and they are their usual, nothing short of brilliant comments! If anyone at FF is the best in their writing and critiquing, she definitely is. A class act! 🙂
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I think when you rework something it becomes even better.. so also in this case. I do love the voice of this, and as Sandra says first person is so much better for a narrative like this. I have found I have switched away from third person more and more…
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First person can add power, but is not always possible within the construct of a story.
Glad you liked this.
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Nicely done. I like a character who can overcome and balance the emotional angst of others.
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While casually driving them insane, Joseph.
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Dear CE,
At least the book and adorable accent puts him back in her good graces. Well paced story.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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He is always in her good graces, he just frustrates the holy mince out of her.
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She’s lucky to have him – any latecomer who can charm a stewardess has got to be an asset. And I’m so glad you switched to first person intro’s – whilst the ‘bizarre’ rhymes were very cleverly constructed, I must confess I have an aversion to the use of third person self-narratives. It kills me when I have to do bios for published work, so thankfully they’re self limiting. I liked this story, and if left me wanting more.
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Oops, no apostrophe in intros.
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And ‘it’ not ‘if’. I think I need to go and lie down.
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Thanks for the comment, Sandra, glad you liked the story.
Always leave them wanting more, as someone somewhere might have said, at least apocryphally.
I am even more pleased to know that the wretched pink annoyance got on your nerves too.
Do you know how hard it is to eliminate a cartoon heffelump?
Even now he persists in writing his ‘Saturday Sob’ and other occasional nonsense:
https://cavalairesurmer.wordpress.com/
And I agree that bios are painful, for the writer and the reader.
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