Friday Fictioneers is hosted by the wonderful Rochelle, the undisputed master of what I call Sound Bite Fiction.
She sets the weekly challenge, and the standard.
The darkness in thereclininggentleman’s atmospheric photo did not, I confess, take me anywhere near a Hawaiian beach.
The idea here is to write a story of around 100 words based on the picture, below.
© The Reclining Gentleman
The Bridge
He gets great pleasure from bridges.
His enthusiasm for such boyish things is among his most attractive traits, one of the reasons we have been together so long.
We stroll hand in hand across the river, pause where the parapet is broken.
The dark water is far below our feet.
A sudden thought crosses my mind.
Quite abruptly I feel nervous, start to walk.
We stop for a coffee.
Did you think about…, he asks, head tilted, miming a push.
I redden, stammer denials.
His lips turn up, the smile not quite reaching his eyes.
Neither did I, he says.
Scary! Having such a partner would give me pause around bridges, stairs, tall buildings…or maybe around the partner period.
Definitely food for thought, Joseph.
The man in the story seems like a great guy….He intuitively understood her thought at the low parapet and openly asked her about it. Maybe if she had been honest…the smile would have reached his eyes? Very well written story showing the layers of tension beneath a benign stroll.
I love your interpretation, dear lady.
It is intelligent and creative.
Thank you.
Makes me glad I am single.
I imagine you, Dawn, to be more a pusher than a pushee!
Always a pleasure to welcome you here.
Lovely work. A bright start getting quickly darker. Nice.
KT
Cheers, KT, in my world dark is good.
it’s chilling when the dark surfaces and relieving when subsides…i wonder who doesn’t have this dark sides…nice powerful write…
Kind words, Sumana, and your comments are very true.
Thank you.
I can tell that if one were to scratch away the surface of their relationship, dark tendencies would emerge. There is more to them that meets the eye. Great take on the picture.
Thank you, Francesca, it does seem that their relationship is perhaps a tad strained.
Intriguing ambiguity here. Is it better to be in tune with the darkness or hide it?
I like the abrupt change from discussion of boyish preoccupations. Could feel that dark water.
What is it about this photo this week?
I have no answer to your two questions, MJL, so I will respond to your statements!
Glad you found it of interest, and liked it.
The dark water is far below our feet. Beautifully framed.
And dark thoughts should not hover around their minds. A very different take on the prompt ;bridge.
http://ideasolsi65.blogspot.in/2015/09/road-to-freedom.html?m=1
Dark thoughts hover endlessly in minds here, Kalpana.
Thank you for visiting and commenting.
Add one more to 50 Ways to Leave Your Lover. Just chunk him off the bridge, Midge.
It sounds like they have a lot in common. A great piece, CE.
Fling her in the drink, Wink,
Drop her with a splash, Flash.
We may be on our way to double trouble here, Russell!
Oh, and thanks.
Good thing they weren’t drunk!
No alcohol on this blog, Nonnaci, and no bad language.
Something approaching an excess of death and destruction, however!
i wonder what bridge they’re crossing this time. hopefully, it’s one they’ll both enjoy. 🙂
We live in hope, Plaridel.
Thanks for your comment.
Dear CE,
One wonders, how many couples walk a bridge with dark thoughts on their minds but never voice them. A bit sinister with a cloud of spine-chilling lurking around them. Great interpretation of the photo prompt.
Adios,
Isadora 😎
Thank you, Isadora.
I am sure someone as sweet as you never harbours such thoughts!
Thank you for trusting us with this tale. I could go so many places from here.
I am now not sure I should have, Tracey.
I think you may have a somewhat sinister streak in there!
Care to walk with me?
Whimper…
Gulp…ominous. His smile didn’t quite reach his eyes…very telling. I would be paying attention…
Oh, ominous is good, thank you!
Wow, that’s an interesting bit of tension and definitely a dark undertone. I think I’d skip bridges and high places with this guy. Great story, CE.
You are very kind, Amy, I am sure no one would ever consider throwing you off a bridge.
Gosh I don’t think its her that has to worry but him. He is at least out in the open about his thoughts. She on the other hand is not letting on that she wanted to badly, more than just a passing thought and she had to hurry on or else…….. I think if I were him I’d change my love of bridges to perhaps merry go rounds. Enjoyed the swirling depths.
I do enjoy your comments, Irene.
You seem to get right into the story and the characters, and analyse the situation so well.
But beware of carousels, they too can be dangerous places!
If I can’t get into a character (even if it is not what the author meant) then I feel the fiction has failed and I love making up stories about everything and anything. Glad you don’t mind. As for carousels being dangerous– one day perhaps the prompt will let me tell the tale of falling off the horse that was going up and down……
You are always welcome to interpret my words as you see fit, Irene.
If you do not read what I meant to write, then the failure is mine.
My carousel tales are much more lethal than yours, I suspect!
🙂
Dark undertones here – trouble in paradise? Maybe they’ve been together too long. Great story.
Things ain’t goin’ too smooth, for sure.
Glad you enjoyed.
‘Boyish things’? I don’t think so. Fascinating dynamics between these two. There’s a dark undercurrent, but if they’ve been together for ‘so long’ then they must know each other’s dark places, and I suspect there’s a bit of a game going on. I love the ambiguity.
Dark places are sometimes built on shifting sands, Margaret.
Glad you found something to ponder, and something to enjoy.
And they had been together a long time? Hmmm ….. The gradual building up and final denouement were great.
Thank you, JJ, food for thought, hmmm?
When ever hubby and I hike a high trail with dangerous possibilities, he always describes to me how he’ll stage my death. I told him yesterday to make sure he doesn’t mark the spot with an X or visit the place 9 times before hand and maybe he’ll get away with it. LOL
Loved it!
Hubby sounds like a lovely man, Yolanda.
Are you well insured?
I guess that’s the “boyish” quality you found attractive in him. 🙂
And did I think that while visiting the Grand Canyon with my husband. No. Or not. A dark side we all have.
And sometimes we drift that way, mentally at least, do we not?
Thanks for visiting, Alicia.
An excellent story and interesting moment in time. Love the “push off” line.
Happy trails! TMWR
My trails do not lead to steep cliffs!
Glad you enjoyed, TMWR, your words are appreciated.
Superb scary tale.
You lead us to darkness allin light touches.
It’s all in the mind, Em, the darkness is hidden in the shadows.
Yikes!!
Exactly!
Splendid. Enjoyed this bit of darkish very much.
Then my job is done!
Thank you
Delightful dark subtext, really well done!
Shucks, ma’am, you are very kind.
My day just got better.
Time not to walk the bridge together; both at risk. Great piece, full of anticipating doom.
Better safe and all that, eh, Patrick?
Glad you enjoyed it.
Great story CE. Loved the connotation.
Thank you, Joy.
Neither did he…. I think she should avoid crossing said bridge with him in the future…
I prefer to think that she will cross that bridge when she comes to it.
Or wait until I can find another cliche!
Hee hee hee!
I really like how subtle this story is. Some very dark implications!
Subtle with dark implications…
Comments like this make writing worthwhile.
Thank you.
Jezz, what a delightfully dark story.
And what a delightfully light comment.
Thank you.
Interesting that neither wants to discuss their negative thoughts. Nicely done!
How many of us do?
Glad you liked it, Caerlynn.
Ooh, lots going on beneath the surface of that conversation and relationship. Nicely written.
Great, Claire, you got exactly what I was aiming for.
They both sound like fairly complex characters. They might be better going their separate ways. You crafted his eeriness very well.
Eeriness?
Yes, I like that.
Thanks for your comment, Sandra, always appreciated.
nicely creepy – well done!
I like ‘nicely creepy’, thank you, Niki.
I think they at least have some common ground… it could be a new beginning to an end.
A mutual dislike and distrust, Bjorn?
Sounds like the basis for a fun time.
Maybe they could go rock climbing, hang gliding or parachuting together!
Temptingly implied. The smile didn’t reach his eyes because he was lying. So was she. I wouldn’t feel comfortable in that relationship. Very well told. It gave me the feeling without the details to make it explicit.
Thank you for your kind and thoughtful comments, Jenny, very much appreciated.
This is brilliant… and very creepy.
Hey, thanks, Jenny, that makes my day!
Good spot of innuendo about the relationship, there. They should both push off, but not on a bridge.
You think they are on the brink, hmm?
Teetering, for sure.
Dear C..E.,
The smile doesn’t reach his eyes. Good line. Lot of inner thoughts not voiced but understood. I’m glad neither of them acted on it. Nice one.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Thank you, m’lady, glad you enjoyed.
Reblogged this on anelephantcant and commented:
AnElephantCant go out after dark
There are so many scary things that lurk in the night
If he gets the itch
To fling himself from a bridge
He prefers to do it in sunny daylight
A perfect synthesis of dark and light. Well done.
Cheers, Mick