AnElephantCant claim he’s a chef
Which is surprising for a chap of his mettle
He leaves most food uncut
Prefers to munch a peanut
AnElephantCant boil a kettle
Once again it is Friday Fictioneer time.
Our charismatic culinarist Rochelle heats up a host of hard-working hacks to fry a feast of fantastic fables.
And AnElephant is a recipe for disaster.
The idea is to write a very short story, circa 100 words, based on this picture prompt (below).
That’s it.
© Raina Ng
After Linda
We have a traditional marriage.
I am the bread-winner, Linda the housewife.
We have no children, but we still have hopes.
I am quite surprised when she tells me she is leaving.
Or, more precisely, when she tells me she has left.
I read her note, taped to my lap-top.
It is almost funny, it is such a cliché.
My wife has gone off with my best friend.
Well, I did not see that coming.
I quickly make plans.
I head towards the rear of our sprawling mansion.
I push open a door, stand open-mouthed.
Wow, I think, nice kitchen.
I’m not sure she’s going to be much better off if she’s hooked up with his best friend – there’s a good chance the two men will have similar attitudes. However, I wish her luck. This is a good story. Elephant. Love the ending.
If he’s living in a mansion I think he was probably doing a good job as bread-winner, even if he wasn’t a very good husband. He’s going to have to become familiar with his kitchen if he wants to eat… or maybe he’ll resort to ordering takeout every day… or maybe he’ll just hire a cook… Great story. 🙂
Options galore for the man who has everything, except a wife!
Thank you for your time and your praise.
Dear Elephant, Wonderful story and he probably had never been in the kitchen – too bad; If his wife was a good cook he should be upset. On the other hand, if she can only cook a peanut, she will not be missed. He probably has money so he can hire a cook or whatever. Cute! Nan
Oh Nan, how could you!!!
Only a peanut, indeed!
AnElephant is staggered by such sacrilege.
He is so upset he refuses to tell you that he is happy you liked his story.
You have dropped far down the adorable stakes here.
After Paula Yates left Bob Geldof she said he didn’t know where to find the washing machine. There may have been other reasons. Can’t believe I’m telling you this or even that I know this!
Great last line. I wanted to hate this guy but somehow I couldn’t in the end. He has paid for it (in so many ways) I hope he enjoys his kitchen!
Bob needs to look under the cushions on the settee, that is where AnElephant finds most things he is looking for.
And the poor man is surely not hateful, just a bit awry in his priorities, perhaps.
Glad you liked it enough to share your wisdom!
Throw in a few more of those light fittings and he could have the entire solar system in his kitchen! Loved your story Mr Elephant … I won’t pick a side because I’m boring in that I can see both of their points of view. Neither is wrong and neither is right 🙂
The lady is very wise.
AnElephant always says there are three sides to every story – his, hers, and the truth.
lol!
I suspect he will hire a cook the next day! Sprawling mansion. Loved the story.
Seems a distinct possibility!
Happy you enjoyed.
Perhaps he will hire a chef to teach him how to cook. Could even be a reality show.
Millionaire’s Muffins or Filthy Rich éclairs or cannoli
I’d best stop. That would be a post all of its own.
AnElephant suspects that re-marriage is more likely than the Haggis Happening or the Porridge Pretext!
But an interesting idea, dear lady, AnElephant wonders if you are slightly barmy?
Oh, more than slightly if it means what I think. Now to double-check 🙂
Hasn’t he ever stepped into the beautiful kitchen before.?
He does not like to trample on the lovely lady’s toes, perhaps.
A bit too traditional methinks. What a clever tale.
Thanks, Patrick.
Yes, sometimes even AnElephant can be too set in his ways.
love it as always. It is a wonderful kitchen, I wonder what AnElephant will cook first
If Samantha wants to pop by for munchies, AnElephant serves a very tasty peanut!
I hope he’s a better cook than I – in the years I spent single, the most oft used kitchen implement was the phone for takeout 🙂
Well done.
Thank you, sir.
He too can use a phone, we can be sure.
If she hadn’t left a note perhaps he may never have noticed. He may have just thought she was in the kitchen.
Until dinner time at least!
True Enuff!
i guess it’s not too late to learn how to cook. 🙂
Hmm, time will tell.
Old dogs and all that…
Ironic…most of the great chefs are men. 😉 Maybe this one will find his passion in his newly discovered kitchen?
Yes, but most men are not great chefs!
Looks like his passion needs to be found somewhere.
Agreed!
He may find the bedroom next 🙂
DJ
And, hopefully, the bathroom!
I think catering will work well… a TV-sofa and catered food should be good enough. Maybe he can build a billiard in the kitchen.
Like AnElephant, Bjorn is pragmatic to the last!
That would be me! I look at the kitchen and if I love it, I buy the house. LOL! Wonderful story.
He shouldn’t be hard to deal with, Joy!
LOL. It’s not unheard of in some traditional cultures for the man to have never set foot in the kitchen. Nice format for the story too.
Ah, you know Scotland, obviously!
Glad you enjoyed.
Well I can’t imagine what persuaded her to leave. And I think he’s going to have plenty of time to enjoy the strange kitchen. Nice one.
Thanks, Sandra, not all guys get their priorities right every time.
Wow, interesting that he never even set foot in the kitchen. I wonder what else he missed.
Obviously something more important than toast, given that she has scarpered with his buddy.
He’ll have to get his own food now! Great!
Rosey Pinkerton’s blog
The poor chap has been slaving over a hot whatsit for years to provide the kitchen of her dreams.
No appreciation.
Sigh.
I give him a week before the food runs out. Then there’ll be trouble
He has the number for Domino’s.
But not for errant spouse.
Ah well! All that bread and not a clue!
emm’s a messy cook so she thinks
A kitchen with that neat a look
is downright suspicious,
but this little concoction is just delicious.
AnElephantCant decide
If Em’s words accidentally collide
Or if just this one time
They actually rhyme
Nearly
emm’s a poet
and you don’ know it?
Arrumph.
Nice. I laughed. Good for her, I say! 🙂
AnElephant thinks it is cool how everyone picks a side!
Surprise, surprise! No murder or revenge? I think munching peanuts is a better option.
A whole week without a death!
A new record for AnElephant!
I love this side of AnElephant.
And so, a new career was born! Having never stepped foot in the kitchen, not knowing what lay behind the door, he touched the tools of the trade, smelt the possibilities and lived happily ever after, feeding the hungry! 😉
You don’t think he just phoned for pizza?
I like the idea that it was a “forbidden” area all of his life and now, he as access! (Kind of like when Jamie Oliver introduced a bunch of men to cooking and they discovered they were really good at it; just had never tried…)
Wonderful as usual with a twist that made me smile and cringe at the same time at the end. I have to say that I am not surprised that she left him if he had never before stepped foot in the kitchen where from what you say she spent an inordinate amount of time.
Thank you, Irene, as kind as ever.
Men, eh, whatcha gonna do?
Can’t live with ’em, can’t live without ’em
Back in the stone age, it was perfectly acceptable to believe that the man was the breadwinner and the woman stayed home and ‘cared for the house and kids’. It is time for the character in the story to get with the times. Nice take on the prompt.
Thank you for the kind words.
And AnAgingElephant appreciates the history lesson!
Haha I don’t know what to make of the ending, but it made me realize that I tend to jump to tragic conclusions. And I love the alliterative introductions! Keep it up and well done!!
Cheers,
Frederick
AnElephant likes to lead his reader to the place where he will jump to the wrong conclusion.
Thank you for your kind words, happy you enjoy.
Ah, the oblivion…I think he will not miss her that much.
But he does need to hire a cook.
Goes to show that some things go unnoticed when one is living in luxury with another taking care of the luxury 🙂
AnElephant apologises for his tardy response, he just discovers your comment awaiting approval.
Thank you for taking the time to visit and share your thoughts.
Dear Elephant,
A sprawling mansion with her as the housewife? No wonder she left him. I thought sure he was going to murder her and his best friend. Funny ending.
Shalom,
Rochelle
AnElephant just loves to misdirect, especially dear Rochelle, who misses nothing with her eagle eyes!
And perhaps it was the maid’s day off…
So impressive especially the ending part. Amazing writing dear poet, Thank you, love, nia
Thank you, Nia, AnElephant is always so happy when you enjoy his work.