AnElephantCant bear untidiness
He likes to arrange things with care
Which is much admired
Until he gets tired
And sprawls quite haphazardly in a chair
Once again it is Friday Fictioneer time.
Master of Ceremonies Rochelle invites us to the top table to dine on the 100 word stories of seated scribes.
And AnElephant tries not to rearrange the furniture
The idea is to write a very short story, circa 100 words, based on this picture prompt (below).
That’s it.
Copyright – Melanie Greenwood
The Bow
Sitting in the sunshine, I see him coming from afar.
His walk is distinctive.
The upper half of his body angles forward at about 45° from the upright.
He makes slow progress, takes great care crossing the road.
He approaches the café, scanning the tables with his prominent eyes.
He reminds me of a large bird.
Or perhaps a small dinosaur?
He stops beside my chair, takes the hand I extend.
It is almost as if he is bowing to his lord, his superior.
Which is probably right.
After all, the last time he challenged me I broke his back.
Dear ELephant, 45 degrees bent over for life! Wow – how strong he must be and I would stay away from him. Excellent story! Nan 🙂
A compelling story. The ending is totally unexpected. He is super-confident, but I think he ought to learn from the old western movies – there’s always another challenger.
There seems to be more to this story … a great write … leaves one nicely hanging!
This guy means business! I like to stay clear of him. 🙂
Lily
How cruel. But I don’t know the background so…Nicely written.
I too, would love to know the “back” story. (pun intended) A very interesting piece, worthy of expanding and sharing again.
Always enjoy your stories. I know something gruesome will always happen.
DJ
Great master-servant story here. Very dry, matter-of-fact delivery which really gives that last line a kick.
All that crisp power…and a poem too. Nicely presented. 🙂
Could you spare a quick tutorial? I’ve yet to determine how to add the *degree* sign. 😕
Real nice person, this person.
Remind me not to mess with him/her.
Randy
I’d like to know the back story, too. This was very well written. Loved it!
I love the underlying menace to all the ostensible formalities of bowing, taking his hand. I’m curious what their relationship is; if I was him, I wouldn’t have come back.
Very nice! I’m sorry I haven’t been reading your weekly offerings. I’d forgotten how delightful they are! Thanks for the reminder. 🙂
We both went the broken back route. Perhaps all those cracks? Nicely done.
Such a forceful last line – a wonderful blow to the reader (and to the man’s back). Great writing.
Claire
Oh my, this so sharply delivered. There is no doubt who is the master in this tale.
I see this man so clearly. Well, both of them actually. The last line is carelessly, callously delivered. Well done.
Comme tu le sais bien je n’utilise pas souvent l’adjectif ‘brillant’ ou même génial. Mais ici il n’y a pas moyen de faire autrement.
Tu as cerné la puissance du narrateur et son autorité à travers la faiblesse de l’autre…
Elle est écrite au scalpel ton histoire.
Chapeau!
Dear AEC,
And that’s why smart husbands say, “Yes, Dear…” and hop to it.
Great tale from a stellar teller.
Aloha,
Doug
Dear Elephant,
I’d love to know the back story behind this odd relationship. Superb description of the man. In my mind he looks like Marty Feldman. Nicely done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Ah, as in ‘What hump?’
Valid point, m’lady!