Friday Fictioneers is hosted by the wonderful Rochelle, the undisputed master of what I call Sound Bite Fiction.
She sets the weekly challenge, and the standard.
And the prompt, which this week is a fascinating photo by Valerie J. Barrett.
The idea, as always, is to write a story of around 100 words based on this picture, below.
© Valerie J Barrett
Click here to hear the writer read his words:
In the Kitchen with a Mime
Friday Fictioneers is aghast.
It seems that Monsieur Nez-Rouge is dead.
Cause of death is, apparently, a diminutive purple mime embedded in his gigantic round red conk.
She too is deceased, probably by suffocation.
Or so one fervently hopes.
The alternatives are too ghastly to contemplate.
Detective ByHookOrBy, from Scotland Metre, shakes her head.
She is the Sherlock Poirot-Marple of 100-word mysteries.
Her accent is English, refined.
Zees ees most unusual, she muses, I ‘ave never before seen Madame Wisoff-Deschamps used as ze murder weapon.
She shrugs her elegant keyboard.
Zey should know eet’s dangerous to mock ze crazy Caledonian.
Note:
All characters in this story are Friday Fictitious, and any resemblance to persons living or (very recently) dead is purely intentional.
Sound Bite Fiction 
As cheeky and murderous as I would expect from you, dear Caledonian! Such a stabby bunch, the FFers :). You made me smile once more, C
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Then I am a happy bunny, Lynn.
Always a great pleasure to see you here, and to read your kind words.
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Egads! What a ghastly way to go. Let’s hope this is not prophetic. I was planning to stop by the mime’s abode later this week. Perhaps I’ll wear a suit of armor during my visit.
Now, who shall write my glowing epitaph? The Canuck?
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Glowing epitaph?
Dream on, Rudolph!
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So glad I’ve never mocked a Caledonian! Very funny stuff, sir!
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Thank you, Sascha, I know you are far too kind-hearted for such things!
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😀
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I don’t think I’ve been around these parts long enough to break the code — very intriguing! And thanks for your kind words about my photo. Cheers.
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Hi there Gillyflower, sorry I don’t know your name.
Last week our esteemed hostess, aka the purple mime, with the assistance of Russell, the Red Nose, not only killed me but mocked me in her story.
So this is my hopefully funny riposte.
Detective ByHookOrBy is Sandra Crook, in my opinion the most talented writer on FF, and also a lovely person.
I am a Scot who lives in France, hence the silly accents.
Hope that helps!
Cheers
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Ah – Valerie here – that clears it up nicely. Thank you!
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You have a wonderful sense of humor 🙂
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Thank you, Linda, that is very kind, I’m happy that the story worked for you.
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Making crime investigation funny, I liked the light appraoch.
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Thanks, James, sometimes you just gotta laugh!
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You cracked me up!!! Too funny…
https://authorshutterbug.wordpress.com/2019/06/13/fridayfictioneers-the-fortuneteller/
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Happy you enjoyed!
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Haha…you got the gals good!
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Cheers, Dawn!
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A certain purple mime should have been expecting this after last week’s massacre. Great story, made me smile. 🙂
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Thanks, David, glad it did
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Excellent ! La vengeance est un plat qui se mange froid .
Très drôle la note 😂
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Merci, Corine, c’est pas une bonne idée d’énerver l’écrivain fou
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Smart detective can unravel any mystery! 🙂
Interesting plot.
Three Musketeers – Anita
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The plot was easy after the purple mime’s post last week!
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Simply hilarious. Good one!
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Thank you, Tessa, happy you got a laugh.
Did you like the accent?
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Oh yes I loved the accent LOL!
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This story was written in code except for followers of this blog, C.E. Well done and the characters in the story seem to have enjoyed it even if it was supposed to be revenge. Well written. 🙂 — Suzanne
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Well spotted, Suzanne, just a joke between friends!
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They should know better than to attack a Scot! Great response CE.
I’m surprised I didn’t pick up on your Scottish origins before. I decided to work on a series of family stories to produce my first book. I’ve been fairly lucky in that many of these characters are larger than life. The stories I’ve done most of the work on are more recent. However, I decided to go chronologically and am starting off with our two convicts. Mine is Scottish and came from Sawerston Farm near Sorn and they had been heritors and while the details of his crime are a bit convoluted, it seems to be more of a white collar crime. Anyway, my research travels have unearthed that Rabbie Burns lived in nearby Mauchline during his grandparents’ day and it looks like we have links to the Covernanters. I’ve had a lot to learn. I also have connections to distillers on Islay. I don’t think any of them were toeing the line.
Anyway, it’s been quite surreal following my family through historic events and leaders like Oliver Cromwell which were buried in history on the other side of the world when I live over here in Australia and my most recent arrival (another Scot was 1859.
Hope you’re having a great week.
Best wishes,
Rowena
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Laughing.
Can you see the bit below the story, where it says ‘About CEAyr’?
The first two words there are a clue!
Sorn is only a handful of miles from Mossgiel Farm, where Rabbie wrote To a Mouse, among other gems.
It is also on the River Ayr, and maybe 20 miles from the town which gives me my name!
Good luck with the book, Rowena
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That really made me laugh. Gad, there is no revenge more chilling than a plot heated up by a wronged author
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Glad you enjoyed, Neil.
They surely didn’t expect me to take last week’s abuse without retaliating!
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Ha, revenge is yours 🙂
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Oh yes, sir, oh yes yes yes!
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I hope detective ByHookOrBy is crooked enough to solve this mysterious case. Goodluck to her.
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The detective is smart and straight, will not have any problem
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What a great mystery to solve. I think a big red conk makes you vulnerable actually
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Perhaps, although one rarely expects to have a mime thrust up it
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I can just hear the coroner asking, “What’s that purple thing sticking out his nose?”
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Hmm, yes, even a fellow Fictioneer might struggle to recognise her ladyship at that angle…
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So much murder with this group. Messy business.
Hilarious!
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Glad you enjoyed, Brenda
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LOL! Will Rochelle ‘sue you’ for spreading rumors about her? 😉
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Only if she can be extricated from Russell’s huge hooter!
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Hmmm … 😉
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Great work CE! You had me grinning with that story!
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Grinning is good, Penny!
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Oh dear! Now you’ve got me peering round corners, locking my doors, and shivering in my shoes. And then I tell myself they’d never let the Crazy Caledonian back into the country. Not with his track record in murderous finales.
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Some folk are beyond reproach, and never in danger from the homicidal Highlander, who remains in awe of Inspector ByHookOrBy
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Thank goodness the characters are fictitious! It really is, isn’t it?
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No red noses were damaged in the creation of this story
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lol, I guess they now have to say “Revenge is a dish best served funny”.
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Laughing.
Nice one, Trent
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Mon Cher C.E.
A mime is a terrible thing to use as a murder weapon. Very messy. You made me laugh. Thank you.
Shalom,
Zee Mime
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Sharp and silent, m’lady, the perfect weapon
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Oh dear, things are escalating. I fear there will soon be no Fri Fictioneers left to be killed off!
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Yeah, well, no great loss to humanity!
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We do seem to kill a lot from week to week.
Great stuff
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After last week, this pair deserve it!
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*chuckles like a mad woman*
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