Friday Fictioneers is hosted by the wonderful Rochelle, the undisputed master of what I call Sound Bite Fiction.
She sets the weekly challenge, and the standard.
This week’s thought-provoking image comes courtesy of the peerless Sandra Crook.
The idea, as always, is to write a story of around 100 words based on this picture, below.
© Sandra Crook
Click here to hear the writer read his words:
The prom, prom, prom
Oh I do like to be beside the seaside…
Don’t start!
What? Don’t you like my singing?
Nobody likes that ghastly noise you emit.
But that photo by the fabulous Ms Crook makes me think of the beach.
It’s not Sandra’s fault you sing like a strangled aardvark.
Oh I do …
I have a gun.
Why?
I am always armed on this blog.
Sometimes you scare me.
Good.
So if I can’t sing …
Be quiet while I get to the point.
There’s a point?
What do you smell when you look at the photo?
Sea air?
Thank you.
—
And to hear more of that execrable song:
Sound Bite Fiction 
“I’m always armed on this blog” was funny but your witticism at the end was as charming as your lovely accent!
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You are too kind, Dawn, I am happy that you found so much to enjoy.
Thank you
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Oh, this resonated with me as I have been afflicted with the horrible condition of not being able to carry a tune in a bucket. It is all the more debilitating as I remember all the words. As for the gun, it is a good thing to have at the ready should the need arise. 😊
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I always carry one here, I get all sorts visiting!
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Good to know. Perhaps I should strap mine to my thigh when I plan to stop.
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Whoa! That’s an image too far for my ancient imagination!
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😉
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It is not a great song, but we have to forgive our forebears – it was composed before radio, before the internet, before TV … even before Friday Fictioneers. How else could they pass the time. I would always expect you to be armed, of course – I’ve read your fiction! 😉 Lovely to read you again C
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Lovely to see you here again, Lynn.
I trust you are well and have just been off writing the Great English Novel?
And I like that we should show forbearance to our musically challenged forebears!
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Lovely to see you too, C! A mixture of writing (unpaid) and floristry (paid) have kept me away from FF for a long while. The following is so big now, I feel it’s unfair if I don’t have time to reciprocate to a good chunk of the writers and recently, I just haven’t had time. Nice to pop in and say hello though.
And yes, we have to be very forgiving of the musical tastes of our forebears – and there’s a lot to forgive!
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Take that gun to an Octopus’s Garden and bring us back some calamari, won’t you. And feel free to sing during the shooting.
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I’d like to be hunting sushi
In an octopus’s garden with my gun
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Do I have to be quiet until you get to the piont, I hope that the gun is all rusted up by the sea air😊
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The gun is kept well-oiled and in tip-top condition, Michael
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He does sound carefree and happy. Except now I’ve got that song playing in my head 😉
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Why should I suffer alone?
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Dear CE,
Alas the video won’t play here. Everyone’s a critic. Sea Air…Cute.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Does this work:
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Dee-lightful.
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thanks = it worked for me
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Love the enthusiastic singer 🙂
Here’s mine- Nature’s Treasure
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Thank you, Anita
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Ha ha ha, I have no idea what a normal aardvark sounds like, let alone one being strangled 🙂
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I think you need to get out more, my dear sir!
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You sing when you are happy and when you are on the beach. Who cares if others like it or not?
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Indeed, sir, let them plug their ears!
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yes yes yes – sing away
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I could not get the video to play in this country –
But did not need it – your playful piece gave a nice shout out and it does smell like sea air
And that first line had me saying I want to be BED side by the seaside – you know how the mind brings closure and projects words that are close – and well that would be good right now
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Hmm, I suspect you are not a well person, bedside indeed!
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haha –
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This was fun! Now I can’t help but wonder (no worries, I won’t actually do it) what a strangled aardvark might sound like … 😉 Na’ama
My contribution, if you’re in the mood: https://naamayehuda.com/2018/10/03/the-gift/
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Ah sorry, I thought everyone would know that!
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🙂 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cIRGGG8bvQk (NOT strangled, but that’s okay, I prefer it this way … ) 🙂
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Goodness! You have stepped onto the lighter side of Friday Fictioneers (except for the gun, of course) and made me laugh. Thank you.
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My pleasure, Alicia, your laughter brightens my day
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This was fun to read. And I never thought about needing to be armed when I blog 🙂
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Maybe your blog is less violent than mine, ma’am, I tend to have a fairly high body quotient!
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True. Very few people get killed off in my blog 🙂
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Want to borrow a gun?
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No, not really. I like Zing and Zang 🙂
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If she sings like a strangled aardvark it’s likely she dances like a seasick hippopotamus
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Now there’s an image I’ll find hard to shake!
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Never blog without adequate firepower. Excellent piece!
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Gotta be careful, right!
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Oh I do like this piece of dialogue!
“I have a gun.
Why?
I am always armed on this blog.”
Absolutely cracked me up!
And that pun at the end – my goodness, how did you dare?!
Very, very funny post this week CE!
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When you have hung around this blog as long as I have you know a gun is an absolute must!
As for the pun, if I can’t laugh at myself then what’s the point?
Very, very glad you enjoyed this week, Penny!
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Yes, the dialogue was spot on.
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Thanks, Neel
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Well I must say I enjoyed that so much with the audio. I enjoy the sound of voices from your part of the world. I have favored some actresses who made it to the big screen from Scotland and ireland (yes I know they are very different) and tell my wife if a young lady from there with the wrong intentions came along I might go missing!
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Thanks, Joe.
Have you watched any of Bill Forsyth’s films?
Local Hero is the best known, and very good, but Gregory’s Girl is a small masterpiece with an all Scots cast.
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I have not, but may remedy that very soon. Thanks for the recommendation.
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Terrific dialogue. The tone reminded me of Stan Freburg’s spoof dialogue on Dragnet. “Gimme the facts man…” I think it was the staccato style that did it. But the gun made it yours…
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Thanks, Sandra.
Sadly, as soon as I saw your photo, I knew the punch-line and couldn’t escape it.
Well, not without shooting one of me!
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The dialogue was great and I thought all the sections were put together very well.
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Thank you, Lisa
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I’m quite fond of the song, nothing sums up British holidays as a child better – which may not be a compliment to British holidays. Nice flow of dialogue, and raised a wry smile 🙂
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I sometimes worry about you, Iain!
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Nice dialogue, which is hard to do without action description
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Thanks, Neil, it is easier when you know the idiots involved!
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I hope the gun is safely back in its locked cupboard. And I have no ear worm because the track wouldn’t play for me 🙂 Execrable, lovely word. Most enjoyable, the way the dialogue unfolded.
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Glad you enjoyed, Jilly.
Try this:
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