Friday Fictioneers is hosted by the wonderful Rochelle, the undisputed master of what I call Sound Bite Fiction.
She sets the weekly challenge, and the standard.
For this week’s prompt she has selected a photo provided by Sandra Crook, my personal favourite of all the FF writers.
The idea, as always, is to write a story of around 100 words based on this picture, below.
Click here to hear the author read this one-minute story:
The Shack
It feels warm and safe in here.
It has been a long day, ten hours of hiking through this rugged wilderness.
We do it for fun, but sometimes I think we are too city soft now.
This little shack was not our planned destination when we set off this morning, in high spirits.
Circumstances have changed.
I guess you might say we had an eventful time.
I am exhausted, physically and emotionally drained, by what we have been through.
Darkness is falling.
I think about the night ahead, and tremble.
And I think about my seven companions, already dead.
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Ouch, that last sentence packs a punch. As others said, it opens up so many questions, and I’m not sure we want to know all the answers! Great writing CE
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Thank you, sir, good to see you here again.
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I’ve been a bit lax in my FFing of late it’s true
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I m amazed 🙈…. Ur blog is really good
See some of my blog work as well hope you will like them 😇
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Laughing. I am not sure whether to be flattered or not.
You are amazed that my blog is good?
Thank you, I think!
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That was a great finish but more wanted now.
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Thank you, Irene, I’d love to tell you more, but you know that Madame Purple inflicts heinous punishment on any transgressor of her 100 word rule.
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Seven dead? This is what happens when Snow White goes bad.
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MY dear Subroto, this is perhaps the best comment I have ever received! It is certainly the funniest. Thank you for the laughter.
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This makes me think about all of those stories that are left aloft, where people say, we’re here and there’s evil.
Well done.
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Thank you, Sascha, glad it spoke to you as intended.
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Well on horror movies I mean lol.
Like Nev Campbell’s character on the Scream movies or the actress on the Halloween movies (the first couple) Jamie Lee Curtis. Or even that lady in Alfred Hitchcock’s “The Birds” she was pecked a lot but she lived.
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Yeah, guess what, Amanda, I have never seen Scream or Halloween movies, and I haven’t seen The Birds since before you were born.
But I love your description, she was pecked a lot!
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Definitely not the kind of “eventful time” I would have been hoping for! But the, maybe the narrator was behind it all along.
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So, in that case, why the tremble, Joy?
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Maybe he was regretting his actions and worried he would have to kill again, possibly in order to survive?
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So sweet, yet so bloodthirsty!
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Goodness! Didn’t dare listen. Might save it for the night of October 31st then listen at midnight to your audio.
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Hmm, not sure it is a compliment that my voice is so scary.
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Hearing it read was rather spine-tingling. Thanks for the added substance.
Scott
Mine: https://kindredspirit23.wordpress.com/2017/10/19/from-tree-to-shining-tree-friday-fictioneers/
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Glad it got to you, Scott, makes a writer’s life all worthwhile.
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Agreed
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I was going to say the same as Iain – you must answer some of those questions! And please don’t tell me this is a scout hut and they’re on their annual jamboree … Lovely set up and a great sock between the yes at the end
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Lynn, you know I can’t exceed my 100 words or our mighty leader will thrash me to within an inch of my life with a limp quill.
Scout hut? Jamboree? You are a strange lady!
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Haha! I take that as a great compliment 🙂
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Note to self: decline any hiking invitations from CE.
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Come on, Russell, Connie says you need the exercise!
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A kind of diary entry narration, leading to a wonderful denouement. Nice one.
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Thanks, Kelvin, glad you enjoyed.
PS are you aware that Kelvin is a much-loved river in Glasgow?
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I am. There’s also a loch near Loch Lommond of the same name. And isn’t there a Kelvin Industrial Park in East Kilbride where Motorola make their home?
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Does that mean I am a much-loved narrow stream?? 🤔
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I don’t want to rain on your parade, Kelvin, but I do not believe there is a Loch Kelvin. And where the river meanders past Glasgow University, Kelvingrove Museum and Art Gallery and Kelvin Hall before joining the more famous River Clyde at the new Riverside Museum it is very much not a narrow stream!
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Ah no raining as I never parade. Thanks for the update!
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Eventful. I’ll say!
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Stuff happens, Dawn, what can I say?
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We’ll told CE, although I’m not sure I know what’s happened or whether I’m supposed to. Like Sandra, though, I’m inclined to suspect the narrator isn’t entirely innocent. I can’t help thinking there’s a hint of disappointment that they’re ALREADY dead – has this brought the fun to an end prematurely?
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Gosh, you guys are so cynical.
I don’t expect any better from Sandra, but you, sir…
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I might have misjudged you, but on a continuum from whimsical to wicked, I reckon it’s fair say your main characters are usually closer to one end than the other. And long may that continue. You do a very good job of whimsical, cuddly, heart-rending and everything else though.
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MMMmmm. He will not sleep well.
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MMMmmm. And he might not wake up.
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Me thinks about the old movie “Deliverance”… I’m sure that I heard a Banjo somewhere.
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Do you and Rochelle go to the cinema together, Bjorn?
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Ha.. I had not even read that comment… 🙂
It was ages since I watched that movie, but I guess a lot of us did.
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You’ve constructed this carefully, starting gently, and becoming steadily darker until the final word “Dead”. Do you feel that perhaps a little more detail about the friends would have given their deaths more impact? We would have felt more empathy with them, perhaps.
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Just let me know how I can fit that into 100 words, Penny, and I’ll be happy to do so!
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It was just like peeling an onion. You didn’t give an inkling of the end with your MC talking about hiking for fun and being city soft, but kept adding a small bit of new information each line building to that explosive conclusion. Good one, CE.
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Thank you, Varad, I am happy it worked so well for you.
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Now their deaths could have absolutely nothing to do with the narrator. But it’s you, isn’t it? And you’ve got history in this kind of thing. So no… I don’t want to go for a walk with you. Even favourites can get disposed of when the mood takes you. 🙂
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Oh come on, Sandra, you know you can trust me…
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Wow, that is definitely the start of something scary. Really great.
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Much appreciated, Claire, especially from you.
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Ug, sounds like a creepy serial killer lived in this shack or was out and about killing these people in the wild. Great write, especially with Halloween so near. It doesn’t sound like a good end is coming for the narrator. But one person always survives right? Or one couple at least?
Hugs CE
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Laughing again. Thank you, Amanda!
One person always survives? Trying telling that to General Custer!
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I’m going for a walk, I may be some time, Nice one
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Laughing.
Indeed, Neil!
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An eventful time? A bit of an understatement! Nice one CE.
Click to read my FriFic!
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Thanks, Keith!
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Well that escalated quickly. Good job.
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Thanks, James
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A good walk spoiled?
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Yeah, but not as bad as golf, hmm?
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Yikes! I’m terrified, and we’ll never know what happened!
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It’s okay, Linda, it’s just a story!
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🙂
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Dear C.E.
I think I hear Dueling Banjos being played in the background. You took us from happy and warm, to terrified and shivering in a hundred words. Well done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Yes, could have been that sort of trip.
Thank you
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Chilling !
Sad for his friends but I hope he is indeed safe and that the worst is over .
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Don’t bet on it, Moon
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So many possibilities in this story, but in my take, I have sent for a Mountie
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Oh, we must be in Canada!
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So many questions – did they kill their friends? Is there someone killing them off out in the woods? Great drama.
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And no answers! Cheers, Iain
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