Friday Fictioneers is hosted by the wonderful Rochelle, the undisputed master of what I call Sound Bite Fiction.
She sets the weekly challenge, and the standard.
Today’s somewhat macabre photo by Liz Young is perfect for allowing me to express my thoughts.
I have recently been the victim of what I believe to be somewhat unfair attacks by two ladies I had previously considered friends.
They are about to discover that no one has sharper teeth than Sound Bite Fiction.
Bwahahaa!
The idea, as always, is to write a story of around 100 words based on the picture, below.
© Liz Young
Click here to hear me read this tale of terror: Revenge is Sweet
The two imprisoned ladies stare balefully at each other.
We shouldn’t have teased him, says the purple-haired pygmy.
It’s all my falut (sic), replies the poutine-bespattered Canuck.
A handsome rogue enters.
He is even more gorgeous than his interview photograph, the pair agree.
Until he speaks.
Hoots mon, he says, it’s a braw bricht moonlicht nicht the nicht.
The ladies scream in terror.
Aye, lassies, he mutters in his almost unintelligible brogue, it’s the death of a thousand Scots words fur ye.
Anything but that, they shriek in unison.
Anything, he grins, questioningly.
The two captives confer briefly.
Then they smile at him.
Sound Bite Fiction 
LOL
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I like to believe I’m smart enough to stay well clear of this, but clearly missing one week at FF is missing a lot more than a photo prompt! I’ll have to dig back and see what this is all about! Admittedly, I anticipated something darker from you this week, CE, but this was an amusingly witty surprise! Woe be to the lass who’s your muse. 😉
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Yes, Dawn, I wish I had half your smarts, I would not be in such deep kanookies now!
You know how these things start, she said, he said…
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I imagine they start with kanookies… just a guess. 😉
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Jings, I am now wondering what kanookies are up there in the Pacific North West!
And trembling, ever so slightly…
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I love a man who trembles. And trust me, we got kanookies up here! But Jings, hmm… not so sure about that one.
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Super fun – the story and the banter 😀
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A bit of a change, Dahlia, glad you enjoyed it.
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Desperate measures. All he needed was to feed them haggis….
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Hey!
I wouldn’t waste such a rare delicacy on mere colonials!
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Ahh, very good. I love this banter!
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Happy you enjoyed, Clare
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Trouble for sure! I don’t think any of them are to be trusted!
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In total confidence, Emily, I don’t think any women are to be trusted!
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And haven’t we women observed that about the keepers of testosterone?
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What can I add that wouldn’t detract? Naught. The story is hilarious and the banter, too.
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Just goes to show, Sarah, that with the right supporting cast even this blog can be entertaining!
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Very amusing although I fear you may be laying trouble in store for yourself.
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Trouble is my middle name, Michael.
Well, etrouble, obviously.
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C.E. trouble in the Ayr. 😉 Has a nice ring to it, don’t you think? ❤
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We do need this banter… I have missed it… 🙂
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Thanks, Bjorn, feel free to join in.
But I suspect you are not dumb enough to get involved!
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Well done, C.E. Those two had it coming.
Unfortunately, I sense retaliation in the near future from the Purple-Obsessed Pygmy and the Conniving Canuck (or ten-thumbed typist).
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Thanks, Russell, I thought they were getting too big for their sling-backs.
I am hoping to raise a battalion of supporters before the POP and the TTT finish getting their hair done.
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Good luck with that, Guys. 😉
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Haha, brilliantly funny 🙂
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Thank you, sir, glad you enjoyed
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Hahahahaha! You are SO in deep doo-doo.
Keep it up! 😀
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It does seem that way, yes.
I now have the entire female species either laughing at me or swearing vengeance.
Five out of five bit off more than I can chews, d’you think?
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I’d think so, yes … 😀
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Oh man….I’m dying here!!
I’m never going to get to sleep!
You all are cracking me up!
– Lisa
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Glad you had fun, Lisa
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Totally silly but made me laugh.
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We are allowed to be silly sometimes, I believe.
Happy to amuse you
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Silliness is good for the soul. 😀
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Carry on, you three! This is a delightful back-and-forth.
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It seems to me there is much more back than forth, Alicia!
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hm – is there any hope?????
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Yeah…
but no
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hmmmmm
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Och aye the noo. What a to-do! Love it.
Click to read my story!
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Jings and crivvens, oh good heavens. Thank you
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I wonder how many weeks this little duel is going to last. Looking forward to Dale’s post 😉
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It is over, they have no way to escape my evil clutches
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Everyone’s having a blast in the comments. Good story, it brought out the Scot in your readers.
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Yes, they are a bizarre crowd, aren’t they!
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Loved it! 🙂 ❤
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Thank you, it has been fun
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Poutine-bespattered Canuck? I may have a typo here and there (mostly for your benefit) but please, my dining etiquette is nae so bad!
You’ve got the story all wrong darlin’… a Scottish brogue is way too sexy to shriek at (even if we don’t understand a damn word…)
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I defy anyone to eat that muck without spluttering and splattering a bit.
It is probably the root cause of your ubiquitous typos.
And, as Mr Connery might say, Of coursh itsh shexy, you’re not shupposhed to undershtand it
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Must be why I avoid eating it. That and the bazillion bad calories attached…
You look like a typo…
And Sean….swoon!
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Okay, I give up, you win!
I look like a typo???
I haev no anwser to taht, Dela
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Let’s just kiss and make up already!
Here, I’ll go first! 😙😙
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I find myself at a loss for words. Well, scottish ones anyway.
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It’s probably for the best, Sandra
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Pingback: What Revenge? – Friday Fictioneers | A Delectable Life
Amusant tout ceci 🙂
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Bisous, Gys
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Haha … “it’s a braw bricht moonlicht nicht the nicht, ye ken?” One of the things my dad would tell us again and again 🙂
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It’s from the song ‘A wee Deoch-an-Doris’ by the great Harry Lauder, Al.
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Well done.
In many cases, you find people tend to self-destruct and no revenge is required. That said, my nasty next door neighbour is still at large. Indeed, I can’t help wondering at times whether karma knocked on the wrong door and turned up at our place instead.
xx Rowena
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Perhaps karma has an out-of-date address book?
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Who says words can’t hurt you!
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No Canucks or pygmies were damaged in the making of this blog
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Indeed?
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Oh?
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Hilarious story and hilarious-er repartee 🙂 Great way to end the day, laughing 😀
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It is cool to have fun with friends sometimes
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That it is. xoxo
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As long as we hug and make up. ❤
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The story has a moral: never cross a Scot!
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Our words are lethal weapons.
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Dear CE,
Gonnae no’ dae that! Not sure whether to scream or laugh. They say revenge is a dish best served cold.
Shalom,
The purple-haired pygmy
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Laughing aloud here.
“Gonnae no’ dae that!” – really, where did you dig that up!
I prefer my dishes hot, m’lady.
The handsome rogue
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And I dinna wri’ me story yet…. muahahahahahaha!
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Revenge is sweet – and no doubt horrible too! Will it be plank walking or death by haggis? Great fun, C and a fitting riposte 🙂
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Fair fa’ your honest, sonsie face, Lynn, glad you enjoyed.
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Let’s get this clear – you’re calling me a haggis, right? Could be worse 🙂
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Death by an out-of-tune bagpipe player. 😉
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Haha! Nice 🙂
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I see you all had some fun while I was away. Very funny story, you made my day.
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Then I am delighted, thank you.
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Oh I love this. Can see it running and running!
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No, that is me running and running!
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I hope you enjoy your revenge, especially with the purple-haired pygmy. Do they read your stories?
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After today I might have to reconsider reading them, Liz. 😉
Shalom,
The purple-haired pygmy.
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Whatever makes you think I mean you, mlady?
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My name’s in your tags…that’s one clue. And I suppose you could call it a hunch.
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Oops…
Miss Marples strikes again!
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That’s why I rise at numpty o’clock.
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Does anyone read my stories?
I think I am pretty safe.
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Nae yer not!
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This is so funny…
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Thank you, Jessie, but let’s wait till the ladies respond, okay?
There might yet be bloodshed!
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Help ma boab! Ach, but I sense an unbrak through the feefle. You’re no sae bad.
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Jings n crivvens, Neil, ah’m gettin’ richt scunnert wi a’ this pa’er!
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Ha, I had been anticipating this and a perfect riposte. But what are they scheming at the end? I fear for the captor again.
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Perhaps they will acquiesce graciously?
Or even gratefully!
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And then you woke up.
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Methinks not… I’ve nae written mine yet…
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