Friday Fictioneers is hosted by the wonderful Rochelle, the undisputed master of what I call Sound Bite Fiction.
She sets the weekly challenge, and the standard.
This somewhat cryptic photo by Connie Gayer, surely a saint, has my mind wandering, and wondering.
The idea, as always, is to write a story of around 100 words based on the picture, below.
The Bomb
The explosion is devastating.
It is market day in the old town, and the narrow streets are packed.
It is also a school holiday, so many of the women have their children with them.
Shrapnel flies everywhere, killing and maiming.
People are screaming in pain and terror.
Some are trying to flee, some are trying to get closer to help.
Many, of course, are not moving.
Cars are ablaze, shop windows are shattered.
Blood and limbs are splattered everywhere.
Panic and mayhem ensue.
I gaze down on the carnage.
And smile.
It is true what they say.
Suicide is painless.
I’m very late in commenting, but just today I’ve heard on the radio of terrorist attacks in Paris, so I was already shaking my head and wondering when and how it will all end. A very powerful story, CE.
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Today I wish I had not written this piece.
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I agree what Suzanne Joshi has written. Well written. Very realistic.
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Today I wish I had not written this piece.
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May I know why?
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Oh, Indira, you may not know this, but in Paris last night there were horrific terrorist attacks, resulting in many, many deaths.
My story seems somehow tasteless and inappropriate now.
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Last night we were all glued to the TV. So horrific. You know in India we also live under constant threat of attacks and bomb blast. You wrote your story before that. Thanks for sharing your views. World should unite to fight all this together.
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#%^@!
(Because i know you don’t like it when I use foul language). 🙂
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Today I wish I had not written this piece.
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</3
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Most of this is extremely realistic, Ceayr. It could be a recent piece in the newspaper. The tragidy is that the suicide bombers are told it is for God, and they’ll go striaight to their version of heaven. They’ve been so brainwashed they don’t consider the harm and killing of others as wrong. I see this as continuing as long as these ideals are taught to the poor and poverty continues. You can tell they prefer death to the life they lead. Here in this city in India, I don’t go to crowded places any more, but tell those who do go to be careful and avoid the most crowded, if possible. It’s terrible to have to live that way, but that’s also reality. Well written. —- Suzanne Joshi
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Today I wish I had not written this piece.
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“suicide is painless” ah the lines from one of my favorite songs but this is a very different setting indeed. You have indeed covered the horror of the carnage left behind. The final end of a demented mind cos there is no afterlife.
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Thanks for your visit and your contribution, Subroto.
I know that many of my readers disagree with your views on an afterlife.
Fortunately this blog is not a forum for such a discussion.
Cheers
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C – Very graphic descriptions, making this an uncomfortable and difficult read.
I had to re-read a few times to realise the bomber was dead and looking down from heaven – probably just me being slow, but I initially saw him/ her looking down from a building and wondered how a suicide could be seeing and describing. A
A difficult subject well handled.
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Thank you for your thoughts and support, Sarah.
But there is no suggestion of ‘heaven’ in my words.
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Large groups of unemployed youths + a need to belong and have some kind of identity (e.g. join a glorified gang) + ideology — does this threesome of circumstances ring a bell right across history. I’m thinking of what happened in Germany and why so many young man were willing to take up arms in a seeming act of madness.
A thought-provoking piece, ceayr.
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There is nothing new under the sun, Sarah.
Thanks for your thoughts and kind words.
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What a tragic scene, CE. Great piece!
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Than you, Amy.
Happy you enjoyed the writing if not the scenario.
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Yes, very much.
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unique view of a tragedy. Glad he is dead, anyway!
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Not very charitable of you, Samantha!
But totally understandable.
Thanks for your visit and comment.
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I find I am not terribly charitable towards terrorists. I guess I will have to work on that…..
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A powerful story, CE. Well done.
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Thank you for your kind words, Jan.
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This is a painful read because of the content and timeliness. I agree with Tracey about how you perfectly describe the detachment with that afterlife twist.
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Sorry for the pain, but glad you found something worthwhile in the story.
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That is the wrong way to blow your top. Just saying.
At the same time I’m reading this, a youtube playlist tossed up a song about a guy who does a suicide bombing as part of his religion.
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Thanks for your comment, Alice.
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Not a comfortable read, and as you say not a comfortable write. Which is what makes it all the more powerful. Good piece. Think we get immune to casual violence in films etc.
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Thank you, Miranda.
Some stories write themselves, painfully.
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That’s a good write. Very graphic and all too real for too many.
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Thank you for your comment.
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Very powerfully written. You really bring home this horrific scene.
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Thank you, sir, your words are much appreciated.
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Pertinent. I thought “Many, of course, are not moving” is really great show not tell stuff.
The world certainly isn’t a better p[lace for all these idiots seeking martyrdom. Great read.
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Thank you, Patrick.
I am glad that you appreciated my story, despite the content.
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My god, what a vision you paint. The scene you describe is powerful. It seems many have seen such things in this time of suicide bombers. Well done!
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Thank you, EA, I was not comfortable writing this.
Your kind words make it worthwhile.
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top notch, gripping portrayal of a suicide bombing scene. after saying that, i still wonder why the bomber(s) would involve innocent civilians.
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Thank you, Plaridel.
Some bombers claim that there is no such thing as an innocent bystander.
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If I believed life ended with death I might agree that suicide was painless. A gripping and terrifying story that peers into the heart of darkness.
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Our personal beliefs do little to relieve the agony that is caused by these acts.
And your comment reminds me of the book by your namesake Mr Conrad.
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I thought of that as I wrote it.
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Painted a graphic scene, now seen almost everyday in the news. But I think our suicide bomber will find that his lack of pain won’t last – judgement is not painless! Well done!
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Glad you enjoyed, Yolanda.
And this judgement is outwith my remit.
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That was a bang-up ending on this one, CE.
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Boom Boom!
Thanks, Mr Connie.
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What a powerful piece and the twist that the narrator was the suicide bomber. You managed to convey two points of view superbly. Just wish it wasn’t so true to life.
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Thank you, Irene, for your generous praise.
I concur wholeheartedly with your closing comment.
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Another one to think about.
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I do try to provoke a little thought, Corina, so I am happy that it reached you.
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Unfortunately, this is no comic scene from M*A*S*H.
Randy
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Sadly not, but a rather too common occurrence worldwide.
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“I gaze down on the carnage” ~ I wonder if he is actually “looking up” at the carnage, if there truly is a personal hell for people like this. Well done.
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I guess none of us know these things, Alicia.
I just write the words, others may interpret as they see fit.
Thank you for your time and kind comments.
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Great poem! Very graphic use of words! Good take on the prompt! 🙂
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Interesting that you see my prose as poetry.
Thank you for your very kind words.
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It does feel like poetry to me….
and you’re welcome! 😉
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Then I thank you twice, Courtney.
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Very dark but very well written 🙂
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Thank you, Helen.
Sadly much of our world has this darkness in it.
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Powerful. It conveys the detachment of the bomber from the carnage so well.
Tracey
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Thank you, Tracey, I am happy you appreciated the writing if not the content.
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Painless (to a degree) to the perpetrator, but certainly not the victims.
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Exactly.
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A sad scene. Well described.
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Tragic indeed. Thank you.
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Reblogged this on anelephantcant and commented:
AnElephantCant always be energetic
Sometimes he is lethargic and tired
So he has a wee rest
Bounces back to his best
He is really something when he gets all fired and wired
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Oh my, that is one hard-hitting story.
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Thank you, that was my goal.
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You describe so well the carnage…. too well, even!
Truly well done, Mr. Ayr!
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Thank you, Ms Rogerson, I am glad if it distressed you somewhat.
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You did!
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And I see the helicopters from Mash landing… Terrific line to end it all with… we seems to have seen similar things in the soil.
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Sadly, Bjorn, this is no longer confined to war zones, but could be London, Paris or New York.
Thanks for your kind words.
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As usual your fiction ‘bites’ A pertinent reminder of happenings I often struggle to understand. Thank you.
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I think these things are outwith the comprehension of most of us.
But happy that it spoke to you.
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Dear C.E.
You truly took my breath away with this one. I hope he finds that his seventy virgins have been defiled. Well done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thank you, Rochelle, bit of a bite there!
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A graphic description of what must be a truly appalling occurrence. And a killer last couple of lines there. Good job.
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Thank you, Sandra, your appreciation means a lot to me.
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