Friday Fictioneers is hosted by the wonderful Rochelle, the undisputed master of what I call Sound Bite Fiction.
She sets the weekly challenge, and the standard.
Marie Gail’s intriguing image took me, unsurprisingly, to a dark place.
With a ray of sunshine.
The idea, as always, is to write a story of around 100 words based on the picture, below.
Missing
The police are rude and uninterested.
I explain this is quite out of character.
My friend is a lady of a certain age.
She does not answer phone calls or texts.
I give up in disgust, check out her house again, then search her internet haunts.
Nothing.
The police arrive.
Incredibly, they remove my laptop, physically preventing my interference.
Then she appears.
She did not answer her phone, she says, blushing, because I would have asked questions she prefers not to answer.
I laugh, hug her.
I stop laughing when I am arrested for what they find on my computer.
This story will keep me occupied for quite a while filling in the blanks. It’s a choose-your-own adventure type of thing. Fun.
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Lovely comment, ‘choose-your-own adventure’!
Thanks, Margaret, delighted you found it entertaining.
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Intriguing tale. I say he’s innocent of any wrong-doing, though it certainly doesn’t appear that way. We’ll see.
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Intriguing is good.
Thanks, Perry
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It reads as though these two might be “two good ones together”.
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Not sure what that means, Dawn, but you are probably correct!
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What good citizens all these nice people are. Enjoyed your piece and afraid I assumed the police could be the guilty ones. (One of the clues was the lack of that warrant obviously, but mainly due to my natural cynicism) So what did they find – probably a stash of Friday Fiction.
I’ve broken the 100-word barrier this week (but still brazenly used the photo) so I’m sleeping badly, waiting for the Flash Fiction Police to call. I’m pouring honey into the hard drive right n
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Police? Warrants? What planet do you guys live on?
Rules are made to be broken, doncha know?
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I’d agree about rules…which is why I broke them with impunity (It was Impunity’s fault, Gov) last week.
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I started out liking him for his concern, then wondered why he was concerned,then didn’t like him at all – this is just what you wanted. Artfully crafted CE, well done 🙂
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Laughing here, Dee!
Love how you follow the trail.
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Now this one has me stumped. The police are rude and uninterested — yet they turn up. The narrator is clearly concerned for his friend, a woman of a certain age which makes me think that she is at least 50. This confirmed by her not answering the phone or texts. What questions did she not want to answer I wonder. I have the narrator down as around twenty five. There must be some skulduggery afoot as she turns up when the police turn up. And what they find on his computer I can only guess at. I have a feeling it is something to do with that mouse.
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Oh Irene, you are just wonderful!
Your comment is longer than my story.
Really!
Some points, briefly.
I do not say she turns up when the police turn up.
Your guess as to her age is correct.
But on what do you base your estimate of the narrator’s age?
Which, incidentally, is almost irrelevant.
Probably.
He has the same thing on his computer as I have on mine.
Dust.
Thank you, once again, for your entertaining summation.
PS The mouse is innocent!
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LOL. I have my white gloves out and my mind has flown to an episode of Black Books.
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White gloves and Black Books.
Baffled here!
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LOL Checking for dust.
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Still baffled.
Don’t understand Black Books.
I think that confusing already confused elderly misfits is clearly a fun hobby of yours.
Thank you.
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Absolutely. Black Books is a UK TV series – a black comedy about a bookshop, its proprietor, an employee and a girl who owns the shop across the road.
https://youtu.be/eIabRa_ONPM if you can bare to get through the adds at the front this is the episode. It may not be to your taste but mention dust and this is where my head goes.
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Ouch! Inside every saint is a sinner?
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One man’s saint, perhaps, is another man’s sinner?
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Wonder what he did… Good story 🙂
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Glad you enjoyed.
And glad you wondered!
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Thoughtfully written. Great depth!
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Very kind words, Graham, much appreciated.
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Meanwhile, down at the station, the cops are passing the laptop around. “Get a load of this Herman! Gor Blimey!”
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Really, Dave, that is where your mind went?
You should speak to Deborah, below!
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Am I the only one who thinks that “nice lady” is the one with the criminal intent? I submit that while searching her haunts he downloaded her nefarious websites but he took the rap. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.
Tracey
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Tracey, you are entitled to think what you like.
But I don’t ever say she is nice.
(Although she is!)
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Well played, CE. The subtlety of this piece is a sharp kick to the gut, as we go from appreciating a good friend to a creepy sense that he may not be such a great guy. Very well done.
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Thank you, Dawn, your comment makes it all worth while.
Sincerely.
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Aww, thanks Ceayr.
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seems he was well trapped…nicely told…..
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Ah, Sumana, you read it as a trap?
Interesting!
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No good deed goes unpunished even if you’re a pervert?
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A pervert?
Hmm, interesting where the minds go here!
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Well, ok a pervert terrorist. Or a pervert tax evader or…..
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She must have sensed something “off” in him. I’m glad he got caught. Good story! Nan
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Oh Nan, you are so cynical for such a sweet lady!
And thanks!
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Ha. That is so not funny, funny, not funny.
Randy
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Thanks, so not Randy, Randy, not Randy.
An intriguing comment!
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My interest is piqued. Good story.
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Oh, I like piqued, thank you!
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C.E.
Nice work. A tale expertly told. I struggled a little to grasp the turn in the story–here in the states a computer couldn’t be searched without a proper warrant. But the lead up–the concern for her–worked beautifully.
All my best,
Marie Gail
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Thank you for the kind words, Marie Gail.
But I nearly choked on my croissant when you expressed your views on the USA’s post-9/11 legal system.
I am sure such things never happen in the land of the free, where this tale is not set.
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Creepy. He seemed so nice.
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Hey, c’mon Joseph, he is nice.
Innocent until proven and all that, right?
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Well I don’t know now….
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Alas I think what was found on the computer made me think that they managed to rescue the lady…
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Good try, Bjorn, but no cigar this week, mon brave.
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I want to know what happened, what did they find?
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I can be bribed, Carol, into revealing the truth.
But, be warned, I am not a cheap date!
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Oh dear, that poor fellow!
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Or maybe Oh dear, that rich fellow!
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Ah!
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Bad luck. But maybe a bad man (though good with words).
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Aye well, nobody’s perfect.
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Unexpected twist at the end there….wonder if it was visiting the lady’s usual internet haunts that led him to trouble or his own haunts. Nice suspenseful story.
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Good to get you wondering.
Glad you liked it.
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That was a strange turn at the end but a suspensful one! Creepy good!
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Strange turns, surprise twists, that’s what I do, Joy.
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Yes, you do.
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Excellent ride.I want to know more!
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Just send your questions, on large denomination Euros, to:
C.E.Ayr, France
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Oh, interesting little twist at the end. Was he caring soul or a bad, bad man? Keeps us guessing.
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Or maybe a bit of both?
They are not necessarily mutually exclusive, are they?
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No, they certainly aren’t.
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I see a whole novel in this story perhaps. Love the unexpected ending.
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Thanks, Caerlynn, the unexpected is what you should expect here.
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Sooo good! Thouroughly enjoyed that one. Unpredictable all the way.
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Merci, Emmy, imprevisible is my middle name.
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This is why you should never buy a second hand computer…
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Laughing.
Good try, Miss K!
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I like the “no place to hide” aspect.
Good piece.
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Cheers, Mick
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Now that was a twist with a difference! I wouldn’t say my liking for the character evaporated, (because of course we don’t know exactly what was on the computer – plans for a bank robbery perhaps?) but my feelings for him were expertly diluted. Well done.
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Thank you, Sandra, the options are endless, aren’t they?
If you need a laugh, see the comments above!
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Well now… a great 90-degree turn once again. Begs one to wonder just what was on that computer!
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If you really want to know, I am open to bribes.
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Are ya now?
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Dear CE,
I’m glad that the lady friend is safe and sound but can only imagine what the police found on his computer. Love the way you set the tone and turned it on its ear. You’re good at that. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Praise from Caesar!
Thank you, ma’am, I am happy you enjoyed.
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